A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend said that if i dont send him a braless picture from ma neck to waist he wont go on o2 unlimited on his mobile so he can text me as many times as he wants. I said no and he said so everything you said you will do with me i.e. pleasure n sex was a lie n i said no i just dnt like sending pics n then he says i dont love him.Do you think he respects me?shud I send the pic ?
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female
reader, Blue_Angel0316  +, writes (29 December 2008):
 My heart leaps with joy and PRIDE for your DECISION! ATTA GIRL! You showed a great deal of courage here and YOU SHOULD FEEL PROUD OF YOURSELF!
Don't let his words bother you. You will never regret giving up being mistreated, manipulated and abused!
Go out and make some new friends, don't allow anyone to ever do this to you again. You ARE WORTHY of being cared for and treated with respect and dignity. You deserve LOVE. Remember hon that LUST does not bring LOVE. You were lead to believe otherwise by this boy's manipulative ways. Find someone who will give you the best. Who will be a nice and caring, respectable gentleman the next time you have a male friend or boyfriend.
Allow yourself some time here and don't rush out to find someone else. Learn to recognize that you can be ok without even without a boyfriend. Learn to LOVE yourself sugar because it will help you to be stronger the next time around. You won't feel so alone and needy for love and attachtment to a guy. This can quite often lead you into the path of destruction.
Don't be hard on yourself for what you have done. Let it go and do your best to NEVER allow it to happen again. This time you were lucky and you need to stay away from that kind guy completely. Try being chaperoned when you are with guys. It can save you from alot of pain and sorrow. Remember that God LOVES you and you can TALK to HIM. AT least it will help you to let go of some of your feelngs and get some inner peace about what has happened.
I wish you the best and I REALLY AM SO VERY PROUD OF YOU. MY Granddaughter would be too! I share your pain, I was molested between the ages of 11-13, and almost raped at 13 I didn't tell, to protect someone else, until I was already married nearly 4 years later. I was also confused because I didn't really understand what was actually going on. I didn't know anything about sex and things like that. I regret it now because this person continued to molest others.If I had told maybe someone else would have been spared this. If this guy bothers you again, don't hold back. TELL SOMEONE YOU CAN TRUST. BE safe, not sorry. Don't allow yourself to be used this way again.
Wishing you the best for the upcomming NEW YEAR!
CARRY YOUR HEAD HIGH AND BELIEVE IN YOURSELF FOR YOU ARE SPECIAL! MAY GOD WALK WITH YOU AND KEEP YOU SAFE IN THE PALMS OF HIS HANDS IS MY PRAYER FOR YOU.
God Bless,
Blue_Angel
^(**)^
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (29 December 2008):
 Please PM me, honey. I think we need to chat.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2008): Dear Poster
Well done; I am very proud of you!
You will never regret this decision; he is not worthy of you.
RESPECT is very important.
Once again, well done, you have made the right choice!
Best wishes, a big hug and lots of SMILES to you!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI have left him and blocked his number off my phone n he sed I will regret it. Thanks everyone youve been a great help.
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A
female
reader, Blue_Angel0316 +, writes (28 December 2008):
HON PLEASE LISTEN! DON'T give him a picture of YOU At all. DITCH him. HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU! HE IS MANIPULATING AND HE IS DESTROYING YOUR SELF RESPECT AND SELF ESTEEM.
Any self respecting young man would never ask you to do this and if you do YOU WILL BE SORRY! PLEASE GO BACK AND READ ALL THE POSTS BELOW.......
WE DO CARE!
SAY GOODBYE AND FIND SOMEONE WHO IS GOING TO RESPECT YOU AND CARE ENOUGHT TO NOT MANIPULATE YOU INTO DOING SOME OBSCENE ACT. IF HE CAN TALK YOU INTO THIS, HE PROBABLY WON'T STOP THERE!
BE WISE AND LET HIM GO.
Blessing,
Blue_Angel
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionnow he is saying tht if i do a braless one with ma hand covering them he will put £10 cred on his phone n i have 2 daiis to do tht one n if i do a photo with nothing covering them he will put £20 on his phone n i have 2 weeks for tht one n if i dnt thn i dnt love him
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (28 December 2008):
 He's lost the prive\ilege of having you as a girlfriend as far as I'm concerned. He may be a charming guy on the surface but he's a user and will only wind up asking for more and more and more until finally you'll be feeling awful about the whole thing. Then if you do want to break up with him, he'll post everything on the internet to 'get even.' You don't want to be coming back here with that problem, do you?
Walk away as soon as possible. No, wait, run away. You deserve better than this.
No, he does not respect you. He respects his penis and his own desires and holds your privacy and feelings in very low regard. Dump him ASAP, and be sure to tell your friends why. That will keep them from making a mistake with him too.
Take care!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2008): Send him a picture of a bin. Wheelie bin what ever you call it.
With a message telling him that's where he's going if he don't respect you.
Good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2008): Dont send him the picture.
Dump him.
Actually if I was you id ask him to send me a picture of his penis....SHOW EVERYONE and then dump him for being a pig. Iv done it before and im 28.
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A
female
reader, Tigerlily +, writes (27 December 2008):
That's very manipulative. Saying you must do this to get him to do that. If he is trying to pressure you into doing something you don't feel comfortable with then it's HIM who doesn't love YOU... not the other way around. People that really love each other don't use manipulation to get sex or naked pictures.
Tell him you don't like being pressured and manipulated, and I think these people are right, I think you should dump this guy. You need a boy who respects you.
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A
female
reader, Blue_Angel0316 +, writes (27 December 2008):
NO! Honey you are too young to even think about this kind of action. I have a 13 1/2 year old granddaughter and she would put him in his place! He is manipulating you. Don't give in to his scare tactics. You AREN'T that DESPERATE FOR LOVE I DO HOPE! If I were you I would delete his number and find someone who RESPECTS You. This guy could get that picture and pass it on just like a virus via phone text or internet text. Think about your reputation and RESPECT YOURSELF! I urge you to further consider having sex at all until you are much older, wiser and matured.
Get rid of this dude(*DUD) like yesterday's trash. Don't DISRESPECT YOURSELF for any crumb of affection or promises from a guy who clearly is manipulative and selfish. HE IS USING YOU! It's likely he is abusive as well. Quite often when a person pushes you to do things like this they are also abusive in some way, with verbal comments, aqusations or physical destruction of body or property.(Yours) Not to mention controlling. He is trying to control you now and manipulate you into giving him what he wants, stand up for yourself and give him something. It's called a GOODBYE!
You have to stand for something or you will fall for anything. Don't be so eager to find love and honey it will one day find you. It will make you happy and content. It won't make you feel uneasy, unloved or disrespected. 8-)
Get busy doing other things in your life and enjoy the times of your younger years for when you are older it may be too late to find the joy you left behind because you went to far too fast. GOD IS GOING TO BE WITH YOU, HE IS GOING TO HELP YOU....ask for HIS guidence.......you will know just how to get rid of that disrespectful young man and you will in time grow up and find you really didn't miss out on anything at all by letting him go.
God Bless,
Blue_Angel
^(**)^
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2008): He's using you, he's using the guilt trip to try to get what HE wants.
This guy doesn't care about you, please take care of yourself and sever ties with him.
All the best.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2008): Dear Poster
Never do anything that you are not feeling comfortable about; don't let any guy make you feel obliged to do anything; and sending pictures of yourself in the nude is dangerous; he might post it on the internet or what ever; if he respects you and love you; he will value your feelings and not try to intimidate you; if he does not want to accept your NO; then maybe you should reconsider this relationship; don't allow him to make you feel humiliated or uncomfortable; stand your ground and don't give him the power to manipulate you; he accepts your NO or he must find himself somebody else; be yourself and don't change for anybody. Be strong and be yourself. There will be lots of guys willing and prepared to give you the love and respect you deserve.
Best wishes and lots of smiles to you!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2008): He will show his friends the picture, it will go around school. DO NOT SEND THE PICTURE
Dump him.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (27 December 2008):
Of course he doesn't respect you and if you don't want everyone you know (and even people you don't know) to see your picture then you'd best not give it to him. He'll post it on every website he can find and there won't be a damn thing you can do about it. Done bun can't be undone. Wise up chickie, this is the day of the internet, it's up to you to protect yourself from scum like your "boyfriend".
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A
female
reader, lostone +, writes (27 December 2008):
He doesn't respect you, because he should listen if you say no. And if he turns around and says you don't love him because of it, he's just a jerk. Maybe you should just not call or text him at all for a while and maybe he'll understand that what he's doing isn't respectful.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (27 December 2008):
 This is blackmail, extortion, whatever. Don't let him do that to you.
No, he doesn't respect you. I suggest you buy him a cell-phone and suggest he... he will know what to do with it.
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