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Do women daydream too?

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Question - (7 January 2017) 14 Answers - (Newest, 10 January 2017)
A male Switzerland age 30-35, *omi00077 writes:

I have to admit, that when i see a beautiful woman, i sometimes start to daydream about her. What might happen if we got to know each other and where this may lead...

Do women do this too when they see an attractive man?

Please let me know about those fantasies.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (10 January 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntGoogle. It's a very unusual thing for women to want to do with a stranger.

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A male reader, tomi00077 Switzerland +, writes (10 January 2017):

tomi00077 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

tomi00077 agony aunt@andie

Any idea where to find such a group?

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (10 January 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntYou'll need to find a fetish group for it, then, as it's not something many people would be up for without a relationship, as it's intimate and potentially vulnerable.

People are usually unable to separate their feelings from fantasies, so one of you could fall for the other and then it's messy.

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A male reader, tomi00077 Switzerland +, writes (10 January 2017):

tomi00077 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

tomi00077 agony aunt@andie

Well, this would be wonderful to have a real relationship. Unfortunately this is for me at the Moment very difficult because i'm writing my phd Thesis and have no time for a real relationship. What i'm looking for is not a replacer for a relationship but some sensual "fun" to bring my mind to other thoughts temporarely. I would declare this to a potential dreaming companion too. I think its just more exciting to develop fantasies together with someone than just alone.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (9 January 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntIn addition to my other post, I think your fantasies are private ones that you have while you're single or in the early stages of a solid relationship. The only time they're likely to become a "couple activity", i.e shared between you, is when you're at a serious relationship stage.

What I mean is that you're unlikely to find someone who wants to fantasise with you, unless you're already in a relationship with them. To some degree, you're talking about sexting, with the addition of regular life, not just sex. Women won't want to do that with a stranger or even a friend because fantasies are personal and can make us feel vulnerable.

I think you need to go on a few real dates and disregard this fantasy-sharing fantasy as one that won't happen until you're in a relationship.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (9 January 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntI don't think you'd find many women up for that because it seems pretty pointless - they'd have to be interested in daydreaming of you and you of them, or it wouldn't be something you could do together. That would then mean she'd probably want a relationship and wouldn't daydream about you before that. Also, fantasies are often very private, so most wouldn't share with a new guy.

What are you actually looking for?

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A male reader, tomi00077 Switzerland +, writes (9 January 2017):

tomi00077 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

tomi00077 agony aunt@anonymous

To be honest these fantasies circle around the thought how we would become romantic lovers. Not just the sex but much more about how we would get to know each other better how we'd go on a date, how I would cook for her, how I might accidentally or incidentally see maybe her breast and so on. How we'd have then a relationship.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2017):

Without going into too much detail can you perhaps be more specific about the type of fantasy you are interested in sharing . For me , it would have a lot to do with whether I was interested in the specific fantasies

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A male reader, tomi00077 Switzerland +, writes (9 January 2017):

tomi00077 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

tomi00077 agony auntThank you for all those answers. Maybe my question seemed to be a bit too focused on the visual aspects. Its not only that i daydream about women i just on the Train or in the Supermarket, but also women that i know, like coworkers, neighbours or when i was younger the moms of my friends. Those fantasies were even better, as i knew much more about These women and could therefore paint out my Fantasy more realistically.

I would really like to find a woman to start fantasizing together via email to embark together on an interactive daydream. Would that be of interest to a woman?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2017):

Although the question is for the ladies but I am a man and wish to share my thoughts,I daydream a lot but never daydream about ladies I see in the street. My daydreams are mostly reminiscing about past flames and the opportunities I was ass enough to miss with them when they were offered to me on a plate or just remember the times with them. My other daydreams are very silly really like for instance what would I have done if I was the prime minister of my country or my biggest dream of owning a farm and what I would grow and what animals I will have etc etc. Sorry, but I had to share these thoughts.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2017):

Hi

I'm a 24 year old girl. I day dream about guys I have a crush on. Like someone I know already and like due to their personality or looks or both. The same as you said, how would it be if he liked me back too and the various situations it will lead to. Sexually and also non sexually. Sometimes if I really like the guy I may even start thinking how it would be to start a family with that person.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2017):

For me the answer is "sometimes".

Sometimes while sitting on the bus, or walking down a street I will see an attractive or even just interesting looking man and yes, I will have a brief fantasy or tell myself a story in my head about meeting him. Usually it is very brief unless we actually speak or we catch each other's eyes. I enjoy these brief daydreaming moments, absolutely. It's a great escape from reality.

However, I believe in general that this occurs less often for us women than for men (although I'm not really sure- just basing this on how often men seem to check women out).

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (8 January 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntSome women may, but I'd wager that most don't. People are very visual, but men tend to be the ones most likely to fantasise about someone's appearance.

Overall, women are more likely to fantasise about an erotic novel or someone they already share a connection with, instead of someone's appearance.

The majority of men who fantasise, probably fantasise most about sexual things, whereas women would probably be more likely to fantasise about their future and less sexual things (though many get sexual dreams, just like guys).

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2017):

Personally if I see an attractive man it does little for me . Sure I might make a note in my mind 'hey there is an attractive person ' but to be honest , I do exactly the same when I see an attractive woman , house , car etc . So no , a mans physical appearance doesn't do a whole lot for me

On the other hand , if I have feeling for a man and I actually know his character and it appeals to me , then yes , I will fantasise sometimes about what it would be like to be with him

I guess this may be why I find it difficult to understand how easily a mans head can be turned by physical appearance when it means so little to me . In my mind it's all about the inner person and the outer shell is fleeting . Some might think that is because I'm mod 40s but in truth I was always like this even in my early 20s and people often questioned my choices in men because they didn't 'look' how others thought they should.

Sadly ,looking back I see that the men I was with were often more concerned with appearance and although they lived the young and beautiful me , they were unlikely to stick around as the years went by .

It upsets me now when I hear men justifying discrimination against older women like myself because they think we don't look as good the young ones and they say things like ' now women know how men felt when women rejected is when we were young ' because I was never one of those women . I was young attractive and have decent guys a chance yet here I am older and passed over Hahha . Sorry for the protracted answer . I think some women may but not all as you can see

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