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Do I need to let him go and wait for an year to see what happens?

Tagged as: Friends, Long distance<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 July 2010) 3 Answers - (Newest, 18 July 2010)
A female United States age 36-40, *sma_asd writes:

Dear Cupid

My and my bf are in relationship for the past 6 months and before that we were close friends. I would be travelling abroad for my studies and will return back after an year. My bf is emotionally devastated of my leaving for an year. He said he wants to take a break, since he thinks missing me might kill him. He says we can talk , chat or call but only on the friendly basis and if we still feel the same way about us after this year, says we can take it next level like marriage. Since we are indians, i am scared that his parents would make him marry the girl of thrie choice within this year. I am confident that i would feel the same way about him even after the year. He promised me that he wont see anyone romatically until i return back. I believe him. I am devastated of leaving him for an year and about his sugeestion about taking a break. I love him so much, losing him will kill me. Do i need to let him go and wait for an year and see what happens?

Please advice.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2010):

You will be gone for twice as long as you have been together, I think there is a very low chance of keeping the relationship going. I think you really are going to have to let each other go. If after that year, you return and you are both single, then of course you can pick up where you left off, but to expect things to last through the year abscence is asking an awful lot.

This happens a lot in relaitonships when you are younger, it is all about timing.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2010):

I think he is feeling insecure about the relationship as you.

Don't be afraid to lose him in this year if you have a great friendship.If he loves you he wouldn't get married another girl that fast. good luck for your studies!

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States + , writes (18 July 2010):

Fatherly Advice agony auntOne way or another, if you leave for a year he will be gone. You are right to see that he is already separating himself from you.

I have frequently been amazed at how Indians are able to control their passions and push down their emotions, either for a better future, or to conform to social pressure. It is something we as westerners have trouble understanding.

As much as you are in love you will sacrifice him for this opportunity.

FA

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