A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Im inlove with married man,we have been together for some mnths now,judging by his actions i think he loves me,god im so much inlove with him,he dont want to talk much about his marriage,is he using me for sex?do i have to dump him b4 it 2 late?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2010): Abella's response below is just perfect. Print that out and keep it next to you at all times, and just follow it like a bible. You need to run out of the burning building, and how.
A
female
reader, Tbosse +, writes (28 November 2010):
 Yeah, drop it like its hot. You are being screwed. Run and hey, never look back!
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A
female
reader, Miley  +, writes (28 November 2010):
 ofcourse do it right now..if he doesnt want to leave you tell him that you are going to inform his wife about this
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A
female
reader, Newbie31  +, writes (28 November 2010):
 Even if he loves you now, what if he leaves his wife for you? If he was plenty okay cheating on his wife then who's to say he won't cheat on you. Most marriage affairs don't last because the man knows he doing wrong and being unfair to both of you. I would say look for an available guy with no strings attatched.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2010): I have just recently found out that my husband who I have been for 11 years has been having an affair. My world has been shattered and I am struggling to pick up the pieces. If you feel that inflicting this sort of pain is ok then perhaps you deserve what is coming to you.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (28 November 2010):
 You are his little escape.
You are probably not his first.
You will not be his last.
He lies effortlessly to his wife.
Lying to his dalliance on the side is even easier.
Forget his smooth talk.
You deserve better than to be his part time woman on the side.
Instead of a full open relationship, with a married man you condemn yourself to furtive rushed assignations, when he is available.
Tell him on the phone that it's over.
Don't debate it.
You don't have to give reasons.
Don't fall for his false pie in the sky hints that he'll leave his wife as soon as . . . .???Mean what you say.
Don't open the door to him ever again. Block his phone number by putting all your calls through to an answering machine first. Block his number on yr mobile. Put his email on junk mail so he can't get through.
He will quickly get over you dumping him. And he'll easily find a replacement
But stay with him and you'll waste years of your life.
And in the end he will hurt you emotionally far more than you dumping him now will hurt him.
Expect him to try to come back to you when he thinks you'll weaken, and when he thinks the dust has settled.
Do not take him back then either
Now is the time to plan your life.
Energize your life by joining interesting groups, taking part in other activities that revitalise you. Visit new places. Plan a holiday. Your new life will be action you initiate.
No more waiting for his call, for when he has a spare moment.
Now you are in control of how you spend your time
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A
male
reader, soon567 +, writes (28 November 2010):
Just keep it going what else do you have going for yourself. How is he using you is what I want to know? Is you getting his penis as well? Is you using him? I think if you're there to get a husband then you should move on he's already married. Oh look for a single guy next time.
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A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (28 November 2010):
 I have a friend who has being seeing a married man for 17 yrs. each year he moved the goalpost, cant leave because his son is a baby, will leave when son is 16. That came and went, son's in college having a few probs cant leave yet. Sons 23 now, can't leave in-laws arent well. Then next thing is, I can retire 'if i want next year', whatever that means. Anyway she puts up with it still because she loves him. Wife knows about it all, she puts up with it. Who can say why men like to live like this. Don't let it go on too long or you may end up being his mistress forever. Good Luck!
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A
female
reader, iloveyou2 +, writes (28 November 2010):
 just cause he dosent talk about marriage dosent mean he dosent love you, it just means he has trouble with marriage. He is after all having an affair maybe he dosent want this to happen with you too. If it is for sex tho then dump him.
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