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Do I have a chance with my English teacher?

Tagged as: Forbidden love, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 April 2012) 6 Answers - (Newest, 16 May 2012)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Hi! I'm 14 years old, I'm a lesbian, and I deeply and honestly feel like I am in love with my English teacher. Now I know, I know you will say it's a "crush" or I'm just "infatuated" with her but I really feel this is love.

At my school, we have 4 classes a day and we change the 4 classes ever semester. This semester, I have her as my teacher.

She is absolutely stunning with blonde hair and big blue eyes and a nice body. I love her warm hugs she gives me all the time. I bring her a candy bar every single day and I always write her little cards and I always compliment her and I over achieve to no end. I am the worlds BIGGEST suck up. She is always telling me how great of a student I am.

With that being said, she is complimenting me all the time and asking me to do things for her and she tells me everything about her life. Her and I are alot alike and we have the same taste in books, movies, music, everything. She is always telling her other classes about me and she brags endlessly.

I feel as though if she knew I liked her, she would either not say anything or act on her feelings.

What should I do? Am I reading into this too much or do I actually

have a chance?

View related questions: lesbian, my teacher

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A female reader, Kassidy123456 United States +, writes (16 May 2012):

Kassidy123456 agony auntI agree with everyone else that wrote something. Just keep on being the good student in her class and don't jeopardize any good reputation figure that you have established with her.

best of luck :)

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A female reader, Wisdom Australia +, writes (24 April 2012):

Wisdom agony auntShe is being a good teacher. Thats it.

You have a crush at the moment and it feels like the end of the world shattering love... WE HAVE ALL BEEN THERE.

Simple fact is, that she is your teacher, possibly straight and not inlove with you.

Its hard and horrible to hear but sometimes its what you need to hear. I would not tell her about this as it may embarrass her or put her in an akward situation. Continue to be a good student for the right reasons not to suck up.

In relationships people don't need to suck up, there is a mutual attaction. Common grounded interests etc,

For example, after a week of dealing with students on the weekend she may like to go out for dinner with friens, have a few drinks at the pub go for a holiday ect. None of which you can do with her. There is not going to be a common ground interest here. Many people like the same books and music but that is not going to be enough.

It hurts now but it will get better with time. (there are literally thousands of these posts on here) go and have a look at some of the others (students in love with teachers) and see if any of the advice can help.

Good luck

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A female reader, tennisstar88 United States +, writes (23 April 2012):

tennisstar88 agony auntJust curious what makes you think that your teacher is lesbian? For all you know she may have a live in boyfriend who has yet to commit to her.

I'll spare you the stern lecture that will fall on deaf ears anyway...

SHORT ANSWER: NO, it's against the law.

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A female reader, k_c100 United Kingdom +, writes (23 April 2012):

k_c100 agony auntLook you have to keep in mind your age and your situation - you are 14 which in the eyes of the law is still a child. Teachers are not allowed to have relationships with children because this would make them a pedophile, so they would lose their job, go to prison and when they come out they would be on the sex offenders register.

So regardless of how you think she feels about you - she cannot be anymore than a teacher to you otherwise her life will be over. And I'm sure you dont want that for her either do you? You dont want her to lose her job, her friends, her family, go to prison....etc.

Keep this to yourself, and just let it be a fantasy. There is nothing wrong with a fantasy as long as you dont take it further or try and put her into a compromising position. My boyfriend is a teacher and they are always talking about the other teachers who seem to have weird relationships with students, so chances are the other teachers at your school are aware of your 'relationship' and they will be a keeping a close eye on your teacher and what she is doing. So you have to be very careful, you could cause her to lose everything.

Let this go, keep it as a fantasy and be happy that she thinks of you as a great student. You cant be anything more so dont push it.

I hope this helps and good luck!

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A female reader, dmartin89 United Kingdom +, writes (23 April 2012):

dmartin89 agony auntShe does not have any romantic feelings for you. You are a 14 year old CHILD!

She brags about you because you are a good student, you bring her things and give her compliments which makes her feel good as it means she is doing her job well. She using you as an example to her other students i.e. This girl is a good kind student, you should be too.

She most likely already knows that you like her - your behaviour is quite unusual for someone with just plutonic feelings. And to be honest you sound quite desperate to be noticed, like you need attention from her.

This is only going to get you into trouble. If you tell her, she will be obliged to tell the school head and you will be moved from her class. If you start getting more extreme with your note and gift giving then they might even ask you to move schools. Relationships between teacher and student should be nurturing, which is sounds like she is being but you are taking it the wrong way. It's time to move on with this and talk to people your own age.

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A female reader, Thisiscrazy Australia +, writes (23 April 2012):

Thisiscrazy agony auntBecause you are memorized with her every little thing she does you feel it's something more And it's hard to know if she is actually doing all that you say or it's you saying it maybe a bit over the top.

Either way you know it is illegal and she will loose her job so you will ruin her life and your own .

Love is a very strong emotion that clouds our thoughts and judgment and makes us see into something that could be nothing at all

For both your sakes ask to removed from her class and transfused to a different one ..

I'm sorry this is not what you wanted to hear but I'm trying to save you from a broken heart and much more x

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