A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:me and my boyfriend have a very good sex life and have sex at very least once a day. but he always watches porn and then hides it, this really upsets me, am i being silly, do all men do this?
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female
reader, AgonyAuntiee93 +, writes (4 December 2010):
Not All Men Do, But Quite A Lot Of Men Do. Him Hiding It, Is A Way Of Saying "I Dont Want To Hide This Pornography, But I Will Because I Would Hate To Hurt You"
He Is Fine And A Lot Of Other Woman Let Their Boyfriend Watch Porn. If You Tell Him You Know And You Dont Mind, You Would Feel You Have A More Trustworthy Relationship. I Hope That I Have Helped You. :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2010): Can looking at pron cause them to go and fool around with another other than their wife? I would like to know, as anyone gone through this? My man looks at pron all the time every day and when we do have sex it's not as good as I would like it to be. Should I be concern?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2010): I would say "most" men watch pornorgaphy (probably over 90%) and most hide it for whatever reason, usually guilt and shame feelings based on religious superstitions.
I'm 40 years old and watch porn regularly, probably about twice a week and I never hide it. But I was never subject to any religious training while growing up and do not have any of the guilt/shame/repression that goes along with it.
If I see a particularly good video I will forward it to friends and/or mention it to my wife.
My wife and I watch naked videos together sometimes and it is a lot of fun and leads to some very passionate and romantic love making.
Watching pornography doesn't have to be a secret, "dirty" activity that leads to tension between couples and relationship problems.
Its just fun, we often laugh hysterically watching videos, some are quite hilarious when viewed with the right attitude :)
Idea: try asking him what his favorite video is?
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A
female
reader, smiliek  +, writes (25 November 2010):
 Guys view masturbation and hence the use of porn as a very private and personal thing. They do tend to hide it for fear that they'll be judged and it'll cause issues where they dont think there should be issues. My hubby and i have a great sex life too, at least every day if not more, but about once or twice a wk he does it himself as well. I used to have a massive problem with it (when i first found out when we were dating) What made it worse was he'd lie about it. When he finally realised i was about to leave due to the lies (not porn itself) He stopped lying and we reached a compromise. Basically that he wouldn't lie about it, that he'd never do stuff himself instead of with me or more then me and a few other things that i was concerned about. Since then, he hasn't lied. I know when he does it (he doesn't really hide it either, doesnt make it obvious but also doesnt try and make it look like nothing ever happened) and im ok with it. It doesnt affect our sex life or relationship, unless i start an arguement over it, which i sometimes do if im having a down day. But generally its fine. I dont exactly understand it, but from reading alot on this site i've realised alot of guys do watch porn. Not all but it seems most. Now so long as it wasn't getting picked over me, i decided i'd rather stay in an excellent relationship then leave on the hopes of finding a guy who doesnt use porn. As i doubt that guy would give me as much as my hubby does in terms of love, care, affection, respect etc etc. We worked something out that we are both happy with and our relationship just grew from strength to strength, hence marriage lol. If you simply wont accept porn in your relationship at all, then you may need to find a guy with the same views as you. As you asking your bf to stop doing something that he did before you were there is controlling. As is he telling you to get over it. Perhaps you could try and compromise, how often does he watch? Would you be ok if it was only once or twice a week? Have you tried to talk with him about it? And i do mean talk, not get angry or accuse. Since guys dont see why its an issue, and they view it as personal, they tend to be overly defensive over it. He doesnt do it because you're not good enough, for guys its a means of a quick, selfish orgasam. I know hubby prefers what we do, but he always makes sure im satisfied before he lets himself go. Sometimes he stops himself a few times because he wants to prolong the pleasure for himself as well. So our sessions last far longer then his quick release when im not home. From what im told guys do it as a stress release too, not always because they're horny. Have you ever gotten yourself off when your bf's not there? It doesnt change my feelings towards hubby when i do it, so why would it change his towards me.. It all comes down to what you can and cant accept, and then what you can work out. Best of luck
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A
male
reader, soon567  +, writes (25 November 2010):
If you hide something then it’s wrong. You need to be upfront and may have to tell one to him. Let him know he doesn’t have to hide the jerk off videos and you don’t mine him viewing them. I see nothing wrong with it unless it’s hurting your partner.
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A
female
reader, Ellen_906 +, writes (25 November 2010):
I have dated men that do and men that would rather be doing it than watching it. Its a personal preference thing. If you dont like him watching it then tell him. Or you could try looking up things like big black c**k and expressing how huge some of the men are on these sites that usually does the trick.
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A
female
reader, DanceInTheDark  +, writes (25 November 2010):
 Not all men do it. I know several who don't, and several who are planning to give it up when they get a girlfriend.
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A
male
reader, Deeyawn +, writes (25 November 2010):
Would It Make You Feel Better If He Told You?? Look Him Hiding It, Is Him Saying He Doesnt Want To Hurt You, And With Porn He Can Only Cheat "With Himself" Nothing Can Replace The "Real Deal", If He Had To Choose, He Would Choose You,(Any Smart, Sane, Male Would AND SHOULD Choose Thier Mate) But He Doesnt Really Have To Make That Choice Cause Its Not Demanded... If Hes Looking At Porn, Its To Explore Or Just Something To Do, I Wouldnt Get Mad I Were You (Yet Again Im A Guy) Unless Its Gonna Destroy Your Relationship With Him, You Should Let It Slide, But With How Often You Are Having Sex, I Wouldnt Know WHY He Was Looking At It
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2010): Thats a lot of sex! haha. My ex did this and it upset me alot. It made me feel inferior, and that he was hiding it made it worse. I don't know but I think alot of men do it, and it's him, it has nothing to do with you so try not to let it get to you.
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