A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have not too much experience with girls, Ive been dating this girl for a while. We dated and we had oral but not nothing further. then after a few dates later she finally decided to have sex with me. Not long ago she told me she bought online a dildo to try a few years ago. And now couple of weeks later she told me I was her first and she was a virgin at the time we had sex. I'd like to know if its a common practice for virgin girls to use dildos or did she lied to me about this whole virginity thing. She didnt seem like a virgin at all at the time we had sex. Thanks!
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female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (20 December 2013):
 You should STOP having sex with anyone, because no matter what you will think they are not as they are supposed to be. YOU will NEVER be satisfied with a partner if you SPEND all your energy OVER THINKING stuff. THAT in turn will make your dates feel bad about themselves when they shouldn't.
UNLESS you have deflowered MANY MANY virgins you would HAVE no idea if a girl was a virgin or not, they DO NOT act one way and one way only. Apparently THIS girl have been adventurous and curious BEFORE having sex with you.
TECHNICALLY, IF you are the first MAN she has had sex with then she WAS a virgin and the term stated it's PENETRATIVE SEX with a PENIS, not a dildo.
You need to stop living in the dark ages, or be happy with you right hand from now on.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (20 December 2013):
 same question different title.
in order for a heterosexual person to NOT BE A VIRGIN by technical standards there has to be penile penetration of a vagina.
IF she had never had a penis in her vagina (even if she had a penis shaped and colored dildo) she was a virgin.
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A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (20 December 2013):
 How on earth can a girl 'seem like a virgin'?! What in gods name were you expecting?!
This makes me really angry - losing your virginity is HAVING SEX FOR THE FIRST TIME. In this girl's case WITH A MAN, NOT A PIECE OF PLASTIC.
There are millions of definitions of 'virginity', some people say you are only a virgin if a girls hymen is in tact however that can be broken at a young age (gymnastics, horse riding and other sports can all break a girls hymen without her even knowing), using tampons can break a hymen.....so would you say a girl is not a virgin because she uses tampons?!
To me, losing your virginity (for a heterosexual girl) is when you have a penis inside your vagina for the first time. So dildo or no dildo, your first real life penis inside you is when you have lost your virginity.
I cant really comment if its common practice for virgins to use dildos, I have no idea - but I'd imagine its pretty standard yes. A dildo is just a sex toy, a piece of plastic used to pleasure yourself. Just like masturbating is a way of pleasuring yourself, using a dildo is a way of pleasuring yourself. It doesnt take away your virginity, otherwise you'd claim everyone masturbating had lost their virginity too. Sex toys are popular now and many girls have some sort of sex toy, so its not really a big issue.
You need to get over this virginity issue and focus on the girl, her personality and being happy with HER, not her sexual status. That should be irrelevant - the person is more important than the amount of action her vagina has seen.
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A
male
reader, wiseoldman +, writes (20 December 2013):
None of your business. And as far as women go, you've a fair bit of growing up to do before you bring anything to the dating table.
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