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Did indulging in a little hot texting make him reluctant to see me? He didn't show up for a date. Didn't text me to say why, either

Tagged as: Crushes, Online dating, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 November 2016) 4 Answers - (Newest, 16 November 2016)
A female United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

Dear cupid

I was talking on text. we were getting along good and we were planning to go out our first date

But he had work over time

so when we start text again.

So yet it again another date we set place to meet and this time he didn't show up. or even text me.

I ask him to text me if he couldn't make it so I won't worry about him.

He never text me or even show up and next day he never text me but I did text him, to make sure he was alright but he never text me back

we did talk dirty to each other on text once, four days before our date.

do you think thst run him off I just don't know what to think did do something wrong please help me.thank you

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2016):

You were just a little entertainment on the side to pass the time.

Sorry.

I think in future you should refrain from sexting with strangers.

And beware of people on dating sites. So many pigs out there pretending to be single and available who are looking for cheap thrills.

Intimate sexting like that should be between two people in a relationship.

So many people will get out there and talk the nasty just for the ego boost, thrill, entertainment value. They are not serious about you if they are sexting you out of the starting gate. That is pretty obvious. Talk about sex and most guys will come out to play for a little while. That is until their wife or girlfriend calls them back into the house. Play time over. Be glad he did not meet you, f#ck you and then dump you. Would have been much worse, don't you think?

Whatever you do, if he decides he is BORED again and texts you, make sure you are a step ahead. BLOCK HIM and make sure he cannot do that to you ever again. He is scum. Don't lower yourself to allow yourself to be his part time chat line phone sex operator for kicks.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (15 November 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntJust wasting your time honey, he is more than likely not who he says he is or else he is with someone already. I know it sucks but that is the danger with online dating.

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (15 November 2016):

N91 agony auntClear time waster, I think honeypie is spot on in suggesting he already has someone and they either found out or he had a close call and had to bail.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (15 November 2016):

Honeypie agony auntNo. I think his wife found out. Or he never planned on meeting up in the first place. A typical TIME-waster.

Some people (men and women) will go online and have fun flirting with people, even setting up meeting and then be no shows because they realize that their partner might find out.

If he was talking dirty back, why would it be an issue to talk dirty?

I'd block his number and move on.

And honestly OP, you are my age so maybe.... SAVE the talking dirty to someone you ACTUALLY know, someone you have MET and someone you are dating. NOT because it might scare them off - honestly? if they participate they have NO grounds to be judging you. BUT I think talking dirty, sexting etc. is something very intimate you SHARE with someone you know and care about - someone who is WORTHY and DESERVING of that intimacy. Not some almost random stranger of the web.

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