A
female
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anonymous
writes:Male opinion needed....do men really not like it when women make the first move to ask them out?I am so depressed, there is this guy that I met in a 9 week training class, he always made the effort to talk to me and sort of single me out to do that with, I got the strong feeling he liked me and is also attracted to me. Our class was ending and I invited him to have dinner at a Mexican dive, my treat, and he accepted....we got on great and he asked me for my phone number and e-mail and said I would get an e-mail from him....the next night our class all went out as a group, our last night together before starting our new assignments, we won't be seeing each other often.....that night he started out paying me attention at the bar, but abruptly got up and moved away to the other end, and then a couple of times I moved closer to him and he got up and moved somewhere else, he flirted with other girls, and he just seemed to be trying to make me feel jealous, and he ended up sort of hooking up with another (less attractive) girl there who has a live in boyfriend, and it was all over work the next day....I have not gotten an e-mail or a phone call from him and it has been almost 2 weeks....The day after the party he came by my desk to chat, right about the time he knew I was starting my shift, and he did that everyday that following week, but then they moved my desk to a less convenient place for him to stop by and chat and I have not seen him since, we work differing schedules.Did I ruin his pursuit of me, by making the first move? Is there any way to recover from what happened at the party, or after a week goes by, do you think I could ask him to accompany me to a movie or to do me a favor and help me put up an awning tent in my backyard? I am also 10 years older than him, and at dinner he said he did not mind, but now I am not so sure....He is a single Dad and having money issues as well, and he told me he was too broke to have a girlfriend, but I tried to let him know I was OK with him being short on money,,,,,What do I do, anything, or ocntinue to wonder and wait for him to call me, or of course the obvious, move on?
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depressed, flirt, jealous, money, move on Reply to this Question |
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male
reader, Dr Pete  + ♥, writes (8 June 2007):
 If a guy likes you then you making the first move isn't going to change that. I think the most likely reason is that he just didn't want to take things any further with you. Perhaps he already has a relationship? Perhaps he does not want a relationship? He certainly gave those hints to you but you tried to convince him otherwise. I don't think you should ask him out again, I think that might come across as a bit desperate. I personally think you would be best to move on from this guy as it doesn't seem like you're going to get what you want from him.
A
male
reader, Salad_Barbarian + ♥, writes (8 June 2007):
 As a guy a appreciate it when a girl makes the first move. That is equality and trust me if a guy can't deal with something as minor as that then he is not worth it. This guy seems to have problems other than that from what you wrote. So I think you should try to move on. Take care.
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A
female
reader, aunty k +, writes (8 June 2007):
well some men love it if women take the lead it lets them no you aint a shy person so no nothig is ruined
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