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Did I mess things up by not sleeping with her in the midst of all these mixed signals?

Tagged as: Age differences, Dating, Flirting, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 September 2016) 2 Answers - (Newest, 2 October 2016)
A male United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

So, i am kind of sort of seeing a coworker but not really, we both agreed it would be horrible to date while coworkers. She is ten years older than me, kids are out he house and i have no kids.

We have gone out a few times, but nothing serious. Yesterday, i meet her mom and had a few drinks. Her mom says that the last time she brought someone over was her ex-boyfriend she dated for like 15 years. But she tried to play it off by saying she invites people here(her mom place) at the time.

So, after we left her mom, we went to her house grabbed a couple a drinks flirted a little. I started to massage her legs very sexually, then things started to lose steam. i stopped massaging legs and sat next to her, i was like get closer to me. She flirted with me acting like she wanted to ghet closer, but the space between us stayed the same. I was like "you know im not trying to f**k you,i mean i want to f**k you". She said "I know", then proceeds to take a shower. she told me not to go past the hallway to shower, but keeps the shower door open the whole time. At this point, im losing my resolve and thinking about a lot and i mean A LOT a thimgs i want to do to her. She comes out of shower and head to her room(door open). I told her "why are such a tease?". She comes out in a towel. I grab her bringing her close to me and i was like "why you keep teasing me." While taking apart of her towel down, she was still covered though. i also was grabbing her ass too, and i ask her "you arent playing games". She says "no". i fix her towel she goes and puts this sexy black sleepwear on ad she falls a sleep about 30 mins later while we are chilling on her bed.

Sorry, for the long message, but i need advice not sure how to approach it. I hope i didnt mess things up by not f**king her. Hopefully, a women can give me better insight on what i did wrong and how to fix it .i dont know whether to just back off or just act normal and like nothing wrong. I tried to show her i was interested but not to aggressive. Part of me just wanted to be a man take her to the bedroom and f**k her until she found a new religion.

View related questions: co-worker, flirt, her ex, teasing

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2016):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

well we were supposed to work together today but she called out idk why havent talked to her since thursday night. I see her briefly tomorrow and i work with her monday and tuesday.

i mean i really like her, but im steadily getting over her.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (30 September 2016):

Honeypie agony auntNi I don't think you messed anything up quite the opposite. She REVOKED consent when she told you NOT to come down the hallway to the bathroom.

IF she had wanted you to do so, SHE would have told you.

When she came out in the towel and you asked her if she was playing games, she said no...

IF she had wanted sex, she could/would have told you.

Sexy nightgown doesn't mean consent either.

Why she was doing all these things that NORMALLY (when two people are in a relationship or trying to get intimate) I don't know.

Maybe she wanted to see if you respected her as a woman.

Maybe she lost her nerve.

Maybe she can't make up her mind if it's a bad idea or not to go further.

Or maybe she was waiting for you to ASK her if she wanted sex too.

OR she has totally decided against being intimate with you and have "relocated" you to a spot as a "friend".

Telling someone you want to fuck them. it's not as sexy as it sounds in your head.

Next time you two are alone (and not at work) TALK about that night, see where she is in all this. You are BOTH adults and neither of you are mind readers.

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