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Did I do something wrong? Once the pastor was friendly to me. Now he does not respond.

Tagged as: Friends, Social Media, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 October 2016) 4 Answers - (Newest, 3 October 2016)
A female age 30-35, *lower89 writes:

Ok this is a strange one so please bare with me.

I have started going to a new Church and it has been great. I got on with the pastor from day one and he came out to visit me a few times. Chatted over FB ect.

Then I went on a date last night and posted pictures of where we were and just silly things.

Since then my pastor has ignored my mails and I sent him two and nothing back. I can't help but think I did something wrong or I shouldn't have went on the date. I'm a single Mum to a toddler so I guess that is why he may not approve.

My Date also owns snakes and I posted a picture of us holding one. So don't know if it was that.

My pastor is in his 50s so it will be strictly church issue if he is. What do you think?

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (3 October 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntJust saw your update, glad it got sorted.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (3 October 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntHe may have been busy and that is why he did not reply? I think you are worrying over nothing, just give it some time.

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A female reader, Flower89  +, writes (1 October 2016):

Flower89 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Flower89 agony auntWell this question can be disregarded as I just received a visit for him. Nothing to worry about. Thank you.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (1 October 2016):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntI am probably one of the worst people to comment on this, as I believe we should all live our lives according to our own code of ethics and I feel organised religion is just another way of controlling the masses. However, I will put in my tuppenyworth because your post actually made me quite annoyed.

As I see it (and please remember, this is just MY opinion, based on one side of this story and on my own experiences), this pastor probably senses your insecurity and is now making you "suffer" to bring you back into line. He is withdrawing the attention he gave you while you were "good", which you obviously enjoyed, until you behave in the way he wants you to behave.

On the other hand, it could be that the pictures you posted were inappropriate and over the top, and, being the generation he is, he is giving himself time to mull over them and decide on what would be the best way to respond to these, given that he IS your pastor. Let's give him the benefit of the doubt. Some pastors ARE genuinely good people.

I would suggest, going forward, you restrict information about dates and nights out to your close friends. Even given my cynicism of organised religion, it still seems inappropriate to share this sort of information - especially about a first date - with your pastor.

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