A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:okay, well, i got on my computer last night and i have this thing where i can go to the most recent web pages visited and when i looked at them there were 2 porn pages on the list. they put the pages in order so i remembered which website i got on that morning when everyone was still asleep and the one before that was a porn one. meaning someone had to have got on it when i was asleep and i fell asleep early that night bc my daughter did... my boyfriend and i are the only ones that live in this house with my 3 year old, but i doubt it was her. well, when my bf got home last night i showed him what i had saw and he just said things like, " who got on that? that wasnt me. i dont know where that came from" but then i started to cry bc i have fround stuff like this b4 in the past like in the beginging of our relatioship. we have been 2gether for 8 years now. while i was crying he said," i dont know y u are crying. i didnt get on those web sites. i dont watch pron bc i know u dont like it"...so, what am i supposed to think about this... do u think he got on these websites or is he telling me the truth?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2009): some advise from tech guy.
1) stop using IE, USE firefox with noscript and adblock extension.
2) Download Ccleaner and remove cache regularly.
- above two are for security reason, third is recommended for effectively blocking all adult sites.
3) Create and OpenDns account and BLOCK ADULT WEB Categories.
remember porn is not crime, seriously ! and
lastly, don't cry.
A
male
reader, OtherStarfish  +, writes (30 April 2009):
 was your computer switched off when you went to sleep? if it was then it will show up as having started at a set time in one of the logs... then you can trace when.
or...put a password on it.... then you will lock them out!
anyway couple of thoughts - my thoughts it was the BF.
so talk to him... say not happy...
Star.x.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2009): What's wrong with looking at porn? Every guy does it. .- another period for emphasis.I'm sorry if this troubles you but this sounds a lot like the boyfriend who hear his girlfriend fart for the first time after 2 years in the relationship and exclaims: "What was that?!""Uh...I tooted hunny..."...and his whole world come crashing down as his entire perception of her changes...Relax. It's normal. Every guy, given the chance WILL look at porn. Asking him not to look at it is like asking him not to fart and god knows that's bound to get mildly uncomfortable after a while.So he looked at porn and he'll look at it again. It's not because he doesn't love you or any other imaginable reason. It's simply biological. Do a search for boyfriend and porn on this site and you'll be flooded with advice on how to talk to him about it.Don't foster unrealistic expectations. It's better to be genuine and accepting.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  + ♥, writes (30 April 2009):
 Well, actually it might have been your 3 year old. Kids can open random links. It might have been your cat sitting on the keyboard. Or cosmic rays. Or martians. Or a UN conspiracy.
Nah! Not that sure about kids, but isn't yours about to go through that fase were they lie their asses off without yet having learned about evidence "No I didn't eat any cookies" while chewing, holding said cookie, standing next to the cookie jar, covered in crumbs.
Well, congrats, now you got two in that fase.
Yes, your BF went on to porn sites, that is why their in the history and he is lying about it because telling the truth would get him send to bed without desert.
"i dont watch pron bc i know u dont like it". Awh, young wives are so cute when they are still all naive and innocent. Unlike mine who can smell the bullshit a mile off.
Frankly, I don't have any real advice except to ask yourself WHAT THE HELL YOU ARE DOING. You can tell your 3 year old what to do and expect her to obey your commands because well your older.
He however is your partner and you two have to agree on the rules by which you two live together. You have set a rule he seems unwilling to follow. It says a lot about you two that his has happened. It is common enough but still unhealthy.
There really is no easy solution. If you feel hurt by porn, he is being wrong in hurting your feelings. On the other hand, porn is legal and you are belitteling his freedom by restricting him. Couples really should work this stuff out beforehand. They never do and next to the question "Can I get pregnant from sperm" this is the most common type. "I don't like porn, he does. Help!"
Either you accept he visits porn sites or he will lie about it. Can he change? Doubt it and he ain't the one asking for advice.
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A
female
reader, jessica04 +, writes (30 April 2009):
 if no one else lives with you, then it was him. Why he won't own up to it, who knows.
Also, if your comp saves the history as the most viewed, then he is going on the site several times a day. DearCupid is second from the top of my history list, and I am on here about 10 times a day, so that should let you know what he is up to.
Pretty much he needs to man up about this. In my opinion porn isn't the worst thing out there, and I could probably let the occasional site visit slide, but the lying about it is what would make me more upset. Approach him that way, let him know that whats done is done, but that you deserve respect and he shouldn't lie to you like a child.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2009): I hate to tell you this but YES!!!Of course its the most likely explanation....the only one if you did not go on them yourself!!!He just knows he's been caught and feels bad!!!You need to tell him to be truthful with you as that is more important in a relationship than wether he has been watching mucky films or not!!Sorry but the answer is yes he did look at those sites!!!!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionokay, the thing i have on my conputer doesnt show the most recent it shows the most viewed.
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