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Dating one, but in love with his friend

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Friends, Teenage, Three is a crowd, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 October 2009) 2 Answers - (Newest, 23 October 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, *oonschild writes:

I'm also in love with my best friend...but I'm dating another person. My friends have tried to help. Lets call him BFF is dating Lisa and I'm dating my bf. BFF and I have so much in common and we get into tickle fights every day we see eachother, promising eachother we wont tell our other. I'm falling in love with BFF and my bf's just a brother...I've been dating him for about a month. He seems to love me because he calls me almost every night. My bff texts me everyday. I've tried making a list but my bff and my bf are both friends with eachother which makes this even harder. My bf always hugs me and tries to kiss me and stuff...Aren't you supposed to feel something in the kiss or close your eyes? I can't when he kisses me! This weekend I'm going to the movies with my bff, bf, and Lisa. I don't really think I'll be paying attention to my bf...this is going to be very difficult...any advise?

View related questions: best friend, text

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A female reader, Molliex  +, writes (23 October 2009):

Molliex agony auntThis could be a feeling of wanting what you cant have ? Or in your BFF's case "having his cake and eating it!?" Do you have feelings for your bf like you do your BFF ? It could just be lust ? Or perhaps hes just destined to be your friend and nothing more ? You are still so young too you have loads of time ahead in your life to decide whether or not to be with someone.

You need to think long and hard whether you want to be with your bf and think about the reason you first got with him ? There must have been something there for you to start dating him ?

Whatever you decide I wish you luck and you'll be in my thoughts hunny :)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2009):

before this goes any farther...break up with your bf. Dont start anything dishonorably. True life is NOT a fairy tale. The ending will not be happy if the story is not written right. To thine own self be true and to thy bf be kind. G'luck

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