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Dating a divorcee?

Tagged as: Dating, Family, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 April 2012) 5 Answers - (Newest, 23 April 2012)
A female Canada age 36-40, *_evans4 writes:

I am a single mom of 3 and 27. I have been in a relationship with my neighbor for about 4 months. Hes 40, divorced with 1 child he gets every other weekend. We have been friends since I moved into the house 2 years ago. We had long conversations about how staying single is so much easier in life...after a mutual friend passed away we began hanging out alot. Its now to the point that he sleeps at my place every night, except weekends he has his daughter. My problem is although we are exclusive sexually there is no label or guarantee of commitment between us. He has been divorced for years so I know Im not a rebound but...am I just a convienience or do men in their 40s really want another serious relationship? Is this just a meaningless "thing"?

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A female reader, n_evans4 Canada +, writes (23 April 2012):

n_evans4 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks and I think your all right...Im just going to wait it out and see where things go. janniepeg it was me who was totally planning on staying single because it is easier...his comments were more along the lines of "most women were too needy for him because of his work ect..ect. He has been super busy and seems quite streesed lately but no chance to talk about it since hes got his daughter this week so hes been sleeping at home.

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A male reader, Danielepew Mexico +, writes (15 April 2012):

Danielepew agony auntThe real question is whether this man wants a relationship. We can't tell.

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A female reader, oldbag United Kingdom +, writes (14 April 2012):

oldbag agony auntI know alot of men late 30s early 40s who divorced and love the single life, dont want commitment just see their kids and have some fun. They usually have 100s of hobbies too and lots of like-minded friends. This man sees you every night so he can't be filling his life with all that stuff . Its only been 4 months so your still new as a couple . If the situation suits you then carry on , but if it doesnt and your getting emotionally attached , then you must talk to him about where it is heading , if anywhere.

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A female reader, janniepeg Canada +, writes (14 April 2012):

janniepeg agony auntSome divorcees want relationship, some don't. 4 months is quite new. Maybe you will fall in love first, or maybe he will first. The only way to know is to talk about it and find out what you want from each other. There are also men who fake a relationship in order to get sex the next time you meet. Who initiated the topic that staying single is so much easier in life? If he was the one doing that it could mean he is implying he wants to be single. It would be hard to imagine you saying it, being a single mom of three. Don't just go along with what he wants. Express your needs and wishes and see if he can meet them.

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A female reader, jewlstep4174 United States +, writes (14 April 2012):

jewlstep4174 agony auntI dont think its a meaningless thing, cuz if it was , he wouldnt be exclusive with you , he'd be seeing other women too. Is it convenient , I would say yes but I could say the same for you too seeing that he is a neighbor, its very convenient. I think right now its only been a few months you should give it a little more time see if he says anything to you. you will know when the right time is to say something. I think you will feel it by his actions.

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