A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Next year will be my birthday. I've made friends at work and won people over, when I first started working at a factory where I live I didn't think I would. As at school I was completely friendless and had no one I could rely on.Does this sound babyish if I suggest this? I'm thinking of sending birthday invitations to my friends and I'm not sure how to go about it or to ask them instead.There's a female who I definately want to come to my party, I talk to her now and then at work, but it's difficult as there isn't the time to socialise in a busy working environment. She is shy the same as me. We have tried to chat and get to know each other, but opportunities haven't come around oftenI know she likes a boy band, I'd like to invite her to my party to get to know her better and think it would be ideal, because its out of work, and by her coming will complete the pack if she can attend.What do you think? Help and advice pleaseThanks
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2016): I've social anxiety but not the other, I like to think further ahead, that's good idea also, and I have thought of that, but I'm more focussed on my birthday.
yes, that's awesome that you did that.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (17 June 2016):
 Why wait a year until your birthday? Find something else to celebrate in July, or tell people you are throwing a party “just because.”
I’m guessing you have something going on, like social anxiety or possibly Aspergers, that is keeping you from making friends and interacting socially as easily as others seem to do.
Another idea would be to simply ask some of your friends, and this woman you are interested in, to go out for a pizza or to the pub after work one day.
Or if you have a good friend there, one you can count on and can confide in, ask him or her to suggest the get-together. I remember one of my co-workers being very interested in another co-worker; he told me about his interest in her, and I thought they would be a good match, so I organized an after work outing, making sure they were both invited, along with other co-workers. It went very well, it turns out they were both shy but did want to get to know each other better.
Have your friendships at work progressed to the point you could confide in someone?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2016): That's fine I won't pursue with the invitations, I do and have friends already on there. Thanks for the advice on this and your help it's much appreciated.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (16 June 2016):
 It is a great idea, however I would scrap the idea of sending out invites to an adults party, it is more something you would do for a five year old's party. Have you got social media? Maybe you can invite them over that? Add them as friends, or else just use word of mouth at work and invite who it is you want, it is also a good way to start a conversation by asking her would she like to come to the party and tell her the details. Good luck.
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