A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dea Cupid,My boyfriend is great but has some curious 'quirks' He plays computer games and then tries to rely on me to stop him because he cant stop himself and will otherwise play all night. He enjoys DIY and always has several projects on the go - not one at a time just lots that seem to rarely get finished. However, a new project also tends to become more important to him than anything else other than his paid job. The latest example of this is suddenly deciding to undertake a large DIY project to the bedroom just before we move in together- this means I either have to live in a building site or it delays us moving in despite this move already needing to be done around an employers' preferences.He is also easily distracted by people - we often leave places really late because saying goodbye takes him hours as he gets lost in a conversation with someone. If I don't prompt him he will just keep going.He is very highly intelligent. Could it be that he is aspergers? Or maybe some sort of obsessive disorder? ADD?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2015): I would take Asperger's off the table, even though the description you give is short.
The best thing would be for him to see a specialist. I suppose he's aware of his patterns of behavior since he asked you to help him with the video games.
A
male
reader, Garbo  +, writes (24 November 2015):
 One thing I always suggest in these situations - and this is because of having experience with these sorts of disorders - is for you to video record him when he behaves in all of these "quirky" ways. Diagnosing Asperger's is not easy, and people often miss the cues. Same for other type of possible disorders.
Anyway, once you have a video of him in various of these situations, contact a professional and have those videos evaluated. Ask the professional for further course of action. Having videos for these professionals speeds up the diagnosis because it is much harder for them to know the symptoms from verbal descriptions but very easy from visual - at least, that has been my experience with these things.
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A
female
reader, RubyBirtle +, writes (24 November 2015):
Yes, he might have any of the conditions you mentioned or it could simply be his personality type.
But it's a bit of a moot question unless he agrees that his lifestyle and behaviours are detrimental to him and he agrees to go for formal testing and then sticks to a treatment programme.
If he feels that he doesn't have a problem, you'll have a lot of difficulty getting him to change.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2015): I'm not too sure based on your description as these are fairly specific things. Here's a website... http://www.helpguide.org/articles/add-adhd/adult-adhd-attention-deficit-disorder.htm ... my boyfriend basically has every symptom on it and it's very frustrating but he's going to go to a psychologist tomorrow as he can get very agitated by all the symptoms (and my nagging!)
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