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Could his reaction, to me touching him, be regarded as him flirting with me?

Tagged as: Crushes, Friends, Teenage, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 September 2015) 6 Answers - (Newest, 22 September 2015)
A female United Kingdom age 22-25, anonymous writes:

I like this guy and i met him 3 weeks ago in my college and he has 2 of the same lessons as me.

We take the same bus home and i sit next to him.

Today, i sat next to him and kept touching him and he was like stop touching me or i'll punch you.

Obviously that was a joke and i said he wouldn't and he said he won't hurt me.

Would you regard that as flirting?

View related questions: flirt

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (22 September 2015):

So_Very_Confused agony auntNo he's not flirting. He's also NOT interested in you as other than a school chum.

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A female reader, WhenCowsAttack United States +, writes (22 September 2015):

No. I would not take it as flirting. I would take it as he isn't interested and doesn't want you to touch him.

Stop touching him, he doesn't like it, you were annoying him. It's rude to do that.

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (22 September 2015):

Tisha-1 agony auntIf he was 5 years old, punching a girl might be considered flirting. But at 16-17? No, not so much.

The type of behavior you are describing sounds like something much younger children might do.

I think you've been warned off. Don't do the unwanted touching thing any more. If you have to sit next him on the bus, just keep your hands to yourself from now on. If you don't have to sit next to him, don't.

Did you ask your mother about this? Or your father? They would have some insight here, I think.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (22 September 2015):

Honeypie agony auntNo, threatening to punch someone is NOT flirting, even when they obviously aren't going to punch you. It's a less than polite way of telling you to RESPECT his personal space and stop touching him.

It's not charming, funny or cute to threaten to punch someone.

So respect his personal space, and if you want his attention find another way (like talking) to get it.

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A female reader, RubyBirtle United Kingdom +, writes (22 September 2015):

It might have been a joke but, NO, I wouldn't regard it as flirting. He's using humour to diffuse the situation but he really does want you to stop touching him.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2015):

NO!!! I would regard it as a threat that someone might punch me!

Don't invade another person's space by touching without permission. He may like you, but touching can be a little forward; and he may not like it for real. If he wants you to stop and you continue, that's teasing. It's not the best way to get his attention, although I know you're just being playful.

How does he act around you when you're not stuck together on the same seat on the bus? Does he ever smile at you or try to start conversation?

A boy shouldn't threaten to hit a girl, even if he's joking. It's immature and unmanly.

Just try some hands-off conversation; and try to get him to tell you about himself. Then take it from there.

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