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Could he like me? Or would he just use me?

Tagged as: Crushes, Friends<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 August 2014) 2 Answers - (Newest, 30 August 2014)
A female United States age 26-29, *ysterium writes:


So I liked someone for three years in college and never had to courage to tell him. But I'm pretty sure he knew and didn't act on it. Which is fine, I mean if he doesn't feel the same way.

It took me a long time to get oer this passive rejection and just him in general (I sort of went into a depression sorts).

Fast forward 3 years, I'm over him, had a relationship which I really liked and have no regrets about. Now I'm single, pursuing further studies in another country.

We haven't been in contact at all. Just exchanged plesantries maybe twice over a year. Suddenly a couple of weeks ago, he starts talking to me as if we have been good friends for a while; likes my pictures on social websites; starts messaging me. I did not panic or be too eager to reply. I was calm and very very sane. I am controlling myself. Because as far as I know him, he always has a purpose behind talking, being friendly.

A while ago we were talking, and he tells me that he might be moving here for his Phd and he mentioned that he hardly knows anyone here.

Its got me wondering, does he like me? Most probably not. Or will something happen between us? I'm so confused. A part of me is happy that he's coming here but my mind is getting cautious. Very very cautious.

Maybe I just want something to happen because I'll get what I pined/wanted so bad but don't actually like him anymore? Or is he just using me as a friend he would want to spend time with and then go his own way?

I'm so confused! Any help would be much appreciated! Thanks!

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A male reader, CMMP United States + , writes (30 August 2014):

It wouldn't surprise me if he was horny and thought you'd be willing to sleep with him with only a small amount of effort on his part. Otherwise,turning up out of nowhere doesn't make a lot of sense.

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A male reader, WiseOwlE United States + , writes (30 August 2014):

I can say for certain he needs to use you as a sponsor and contact. Someone to be his guide and someone he can relate to; because he's a blind-mind groping his away around in the dark. Who knows, he'll be at your mercy for a little while; and you will see if there is any feeling there for you. Follow your gut, and stay cautious.

Otherwise; he just needs someone American to keep him company far away from home; and counting on you to make his transition to foreign-studies easier. You're a friendly and familiar-face; and a symbiotic relationship will be formed.

If nothing else.

If he needs a place to stay? Split or share all the expenses. If he needs a guide? You deserve dinner and meals on him. If he wants sex? No way! Get to know me first dude!!!

Don't be suspicious or jaded; just a little skeptical to keep you vigilant against getting played. Try not to let your imagination get the better of you. Be aware of the good and the bad possibilities.

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