A
female
age
41-50,
*luelady
writes:I'm a mother of 3 children and have been single for nearly a year and a half.My marrige vows were broken well before I left with the kids after physical abuse. He had emotionally, financially and verbally wore me down, but the phsical abuse that sparked my babys premature birth was the straw that broke the camels back.My children and I had to leave with basically a few necessities and had nowhere to live until I built up enough money for rent.My husband had sold my car a year earlier, so consequently we had no means of transportation before a family member shared his car with me.Since then it's been extremely traumatic. The police were unsupportive in regards to the abuse and the sale of my car. Child support has reduced my exhusbands child support payment to $0 due to his $11k tax return, regardless of the disbelieving fact that he's a senior agent in a high profile job.He has convinced our local community that I'm crazy and that I stole all his money and abandoned him to which he was devistated, yet he refuses to take responsibilty for anything that he did to the kids or myself, preferring to make up rediculous accusations.My support network is minimal due to the nature of my life. All I feel like I do is support my children, work, deal with the pain my children express and fall asleep, only to do the same again, day after day.He makes my life unbearable, and the moments of peace that come, I get a solicitors letter of demand or a child support letter that brings fear of the unknown future for myself and my kids.My dept is forever growing as life costs more than I make, and very soon, the day will come where I won't be able to tread water anymore.I just don't know how to handle this any more.How do us single, abused mothers who still feel the pulls of abuse every day cope? Does anyone know what to do or have any answers?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2011): Hi
I am so sorry you are having such a hard time. I myself am a mother of 6 and planning to leave my emotionally abusive husband. I can relate to pretty much all of what you have said. I too have heavy debts (30 thousand pounds worth), no home and no support. I just want to run away and hide.
I am not sure what advice I can offer that will give you comfort but know you are not alone.
Abusers never want to own up to their mistreatment of their victims and as you may already know, him making you sound crazy is just another form of abuse.
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