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Committed Relationship Question

Tagged as: Dating, Friends<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 February 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 13 February 2009)
A male United States age , anonymous writes:

I have been dating a girl for 6 months. We are in a committed relationship. She works in a small office of 4 people and has a male coworker that started working with her about a year ago - 6 months before we met. He works at her office once per week and the two of them have been going to lunch together since before her and I started dating. I told her that I think she should stop going to lunch with him as it often leads to more then friendship. She says that she is not interested in him at all and feels that she should not have to stop having lunch with him because there is nothing there. Am I being unreasonable or should she avoid going to lunch with him.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2009):

She knew him first if she wanted to date him she would have, not you. Come on now don't be so jealous. Are you that insecure. Why is it not ok for women to go to lunch with their co-workers. You keep this up she will leave you.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2009):

I think what you mean about a commited relationship is that she should be off the market even though you haven't asked her to ride off into the sunset with you....this is a bad deal for her, I think she can have lunch with what ever man she wants, or even go out on a date as long as she remains sexually faithful to you, if that is what kind of commitment you made her.

If you don't like it then ask her to marry you.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2009):

You're being unreasonable. I have guy friends that I'm not interested in at all other than friendship, and they feel the same way. If I dated someone who laid down the law and told me I had to stop seeing any of my friends, male or female, I would have to rethink my relationship. Maybe you have a hard time having women friends without having romantic or sexual thoughts about them and you're projecting your attitude onto her. But people CAN and DO have friendships with the opposite sex that never develop into anything else.

Maybe you could meet them for lunch once in a while to set your mind at ease. If she truly feels nothing for him she shouldn't object to this.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2009):

I think you are being unreasonable. Id say something if they were meeting up a few nights a week and going to a bar or something!!

And its only once per week. This was going on before yo met her...if she had any interest in him she wouldn't of starting something with you.

You need to let this go....it seems harmless to me anyway.

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