A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dear CupidI got in a big fight with my friend who just got engaged. She was mad over something small and I say engaged people have no reason to be unhappy about anything. Engaged people should be in a state of heavenly bliss. I'm still waiting on a proposal, which is not far off but when I get it I will be so happy so I can be irritated about things but why her. Now she won't speak to me? What's her problem anyway? How can I have sympathy for someone with perfect life?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (26 August 2016):
 WHY engaged people should be in a state of magical bliss ? It's just an engagement, not a mind altering substance :)
It can induce a state of euphoria in the first few days, but then, luckily !, life goes back to normal and you go on being both happy about good things in your life ( such as, knowing that you are engaged ) AND unhappy about the not good ones ( money troubles, work problems, health complaints, and even minor annoyances like a noisy neighbour or a flat tire ) .
That's how life works, normally. As you can see, I can't even agree with you about the fact that people SHOULD be in a state of heavenly bliss just for the fact of being engaged; anyway, even admitting they should... they aren't, and it's strange you never noticed before, unless you live with your nose always dipped in Harlequin romance books .
I don't find strange therefore that your friend found your
bizarre criticism annoying and unwarranted , and did not like your demand that she should act like some weird " Stepword wife " to comply with your ideas about engagement, and about perfection.
Maybe not to the point to cut you off totally (... friends should cut each other some slack, and make allowances for an occasional " foot in mouth " moment , I think ) . But maybe your friend is particularly sensitive , or you have being particularly aggressive in making your point. Anyway, yes, I can see how she got offended, and I think that if you want to patch up things, it will be up to ypu to offer your apologies and admit that you have been out of ordere.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2016): Sorry but I'm laughing a little honey pie just made my afternoon. Keep them rolling
But I agree totally . You seem to think that being with someone magically makes you untouchable and it may do for a bit .. but life is life and sometime life just is relentless and hard and it can take that sparkle off and we need to vent . As a friend you should be there to listen and be understanding not caught up in the drama of you haven't got an engagement ring ..
When did this become all about you ?
Your friend was needing someone .. she choose you that's an honour ..
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (26 August 2016):
 Are you for real?
She isn't allowed to be unhappy about things because she is engaged? Seriously?
Where in the World do you live? The Enchanted Forest? Where all happiness comes from a man only?
I think you are being unrealistic and a shitty friend if you tell her she CAN'T have a bad day or problems.
An engagement ring doesn't solve every issue in your life, nor does it cure cancer or depression.
You don't live her life, and obviously you have little compassion for others, so maybe (for her) it's a good thing to have cut you off as you don't know how to be supportive.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (25 August 2016):
 Okay how do you know that she has got a perfect life? Okay so she is engaged, that's fantastic, that does not mean that she will always be on cloud nine or that stress won't happen in her life. Things can still upset and hurt someone even if they are engaged. It sounds to me like you are jealous of your friend. Just because she is engaged does not mean you cannot hurt her in an argument. I don't think I would speak to you either after reading your post, so it is okay for you to be annoyed but not her? Seriously? There is nothing different between her relationship and yours accept for a ring.
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (25 August 2016):
 What on earth are you talking about? Since when does an engagement equate with the perfect life?? I don't remotely understand your logic or reasoning here.
So by your logic, as long as a woman is engaged, nothing else can really upset her? She can lose her job, but who cares cause she's engaged? She can have a death in the family, but who cares cause she's engaged? That's some strange thinking, and if you said this to your friend, I fully understand her being angry and not speaking to you.
Being engaged does not make all of life's little problems suddenly disappear. Sure, it's exciting and makes you happy. But that doesn't mean that she's not entitled to have bad days.
I think you owe her an apology.
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