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Can I be the one for her if I change?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Long distance<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 March 2011) 1 Answers - (Newest, 10 March 2011)
A male Belgium age 30-35, anonymous writes:

hi i need someone else view on whats going on with my life and maybe some advice

recently my relationship ended with who i believe is my "one". However i couldnt fight it, she was very unhappy with me, and basicly i fucked up. Its my own damn fault. I wasnt the right person for her. It was a long distance relationship but i still have such a great deal of feeling for her, i met her every time i had the chance and i loved her to bits, i just dont know why i didnt do the things she asked me to do. I feel like i missed a wonderful chance to spend a lifetime with the most beautiful girl alive. And i have trouble forgiving myself, I simply cant.

she got fed up and ditched me, now, she was such a great part of my life that we decided maybe to stay friends, i think this is mostly my desire but im not sure, I think she changes her mind alot about me. She goes from hate to liking me. and gives me alot of mixed messages.

She started dating quite fast after we broke up because she told me she didnt love me for a long time, so it was easy. But then other times she tells me things that I COULD be the right man for her if i just change back to who i was. But its really hard for me, i dont know where to begin.

i will maybe meet her soon again to talk up as friends. But when i think about her with another boyfriend i just get so sad and down. I feel like she is the one for me. Do you think I can actually be the one for her if i change? If she asks me to change, does that mean she still cares? Is meeting her a good idea? and how do I go on with my life, she was my only friend. I am trying really hard to improve right now and picking up my life, but every time i get reminded of what i lost i just lose motivation, i think i lost her completely. BTW, she was my first love and we had a relationship for 3 years. And we broke up nearly 2 months ago..pain hasnt gotten better.. also.. do you think she gives me those positive remarks that give me that tiny bit of hope for a reason?

I thank you all for your replies, i know its hard to put yourself in a 3 year relationship by this tiny text, but im crying for help, i cant look at myself in the mirror anymore without hating myself.

View related questions: broke up, long distance, mixed messages, text

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A female reader, GeeGee255 United States +, writes (10 March 2011):

GeeGee255 agony auntMaybe she will give you another chance maybe she won't. The most important thing you can now for yourself is learn from your past mistakes and never treat a girl like you treated her again. You're not the first guy who had to learn this lesson the hard way and you won't be the last.

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