A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i have only just started to have sex...and my Bfs always on top because i want him to be at the moment..can he still tell if im shit in bed if im on bottom!? as he does most of the work Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, skye +, writes (20 August 2007):
 Sex is just as much psychological as it is physical. So long as you and your boyfriend are comfortable and enjoying it then there is nothing to worry about.
It is very important that you are at ease and are comfortable with eachother in both your bodies and your minds otherwise you could be tense and find the experience uncomfortable.
If you are totally secure in this relationship then things will progress fine. Use foreplay. Touch, kiss and stroke eachother, learn what your partner likes best. Ensure you are protected from pregnancy and that you are faithful to eachother. That way you will feel safer and cant go wrong no matter what your position.
Best wishes,
Skye
A
male
reader, Charlie84  +, writes (20 August 2007):
Communicate, communicate, communicate, COMMUNICATE! Ask him what he wants to do, offer things or just simply take control of the situation and make him do what you want. The same old thing every time will bore him and a girl who either works to please the man by doing what he's longing for but maybe not saying, or just simply takes control of the situation will turn him on to a new level. It doesn't hurt to try new things.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2007): um. I guess it depends what you are doing while you are on the bottom. You don't have a lot of experience but I don't think that should matter a whole lot. I mean he is doing all the work but believe me, this is not "work" to him, he is really enjoying it. So don't worry about that right now. If you want to make it more interesting just thrust your pelvis so that you can rub yourself against him as he is doing it. When he sees that you are turned on, that alone is a turn on for him. And if he loves you he is not going to care at all. If anything he will help you enjoy it more and help bring out that little tiger in you.
I would just go ahead and let him lead for now. Maybe he can give you some pointers. I know that sounds lame but I am 26 and was going out with a 35 year old and it was the best sex I have ever had (I think it is because of the age) and he kind of gave me pointers as I too was kind of uptight. And I wasn't offended and it actually made our sex better. So that is something to consider.
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A
male
reader, somewhat_anonymous +, writes (20 August 2007):
Maybe if you're lying there like a dead body. Depends on what he likes and don't be afraid to experiment. If you're afraid you aren't good, then you'll never get better if you don't try new things. I'm thinking you're just lacking confidence. All you need is to be sure of yourself and you'll have a more active role. Then again, if he's fine with doing all the work, there isn't any problem with that either. Take charge and be on top once in a while.
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