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Can a man go from not wanting a relationship to wanting one?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Dating, Online dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 January 2017) 6 Answers - (Newest, 28 January 2017)
A female United States age , *orever58 writes:

was dateing a man for a few months . I told him I wanted a relationship an he then told me he didn't want one . I broke it off with him . but he still tried to keep in contact with me . so now almost two years later . he contact me we talk . he then next day he text me an then tells me he was scared to tell me he love me. cause he didn't think I want a relationship . can a man go from not wanting a relationship to now wanting one an then telling me he loves me an wants marriage .I don"t know where to believe him or not .? he wants to meet up again but I don't know where to trust him. first week he was texting everyday . now hardly hear from him but just few words .

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (28 January 2017):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntFlake alert! Beware! Don't believe anything he says for a minute. At best he is desperate for a relationship and is telling you what he thinks you want to hear. At worst, he is making fun of you to see if you realize.

Yes, someone CAN go from not wanting a relationship to wanting one. It is all about timing. We all need/want different things at different times in life.

HOWEVER, you do not go from not wanting a relationship to loving someone and talking of marriage in one step. That is just nuts.

Take care of yourself and don't let this man use and abuse you.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2017):

Nah! Seems a bit suspicious. He had the chance, blew it, and all of a sudden he's in-love and thinking about marriage?

Come on, seriously?!! Sounds like a corny scene in a chick-flick! I'm gay, forgive the term!

It's possible you got ahead of his feelings and it it took time for him to even know how he felt. Odds on that? Very low, possibly 10%! I wouldn't bet the farm on it.

If he was dragging his feet, or you're they type that falls at the drop of a hat; it's doomed. There is no such thing as sudden love, it needs time to ignite, warm-up, and the connection takes time to take hold. It could be the sex he's missing more than anything else, and he might tell you whatever you want to hear.

If you have a gut feeling this is a hoax, you're probably right.

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A female reader, forever58 United States +, writes (28 January 2017):

forever58 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I find his behavior stupid an I feel like he wants to use me . he wants to see me again . but I think he lying . I just wants to make sure I thought this out good .so when I tell him I got my mind thinking right . an I know his bs will come out . I tried to get truth from him . but all I get is more bs .

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (28 January 2017):

Honeypie agony auntEither he wants sex or just to have you has a fallback option.

No, I don't think someone like that ALL of a sudden realizes that OH HE loved you SO much that he got scared and ran but now, TWO years later he is ready... Sounds like a bunch of BS.

Sounds like he is currently single and YOU will do in a snap - for a little while.

He is not even consistent with his contact. MY guess? Because he is seeing other women.

I'd block him and move on. He seems like a total waste of time. I fully agree with N91.

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A female reader, forever58 United States +, writes (28 January 2017):

forever58 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I agree he didn't want me to forget him . but how do I know he mean what he says . he said he was hurt in pass an that's why he never told me he love me . an he said I always call him a boy toy which I was kidding with him .

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (28 January 2017):

N91 agony auntHe doesn't want you to forget him.

You clearly stated you want a relationship so where has he dreamed up that he was scared to tell you he loves you? If anything that would be been a great time to tell you.

He sounds like a messer. Anyone that messages regularly and then randomly starts to ghost is a waste of time imo.

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