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At times I get scared my bf has gone off me--how do I deal with my insecurities?

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 April 2007) 2 Answers - (Newest, 30 April 2007)
A female United Kingdom age , anonymous writes:

i have shown insecurities to my boyfriend,i dont think he is cheating or anything like that,but i some times get scared he has gone off me or isnt coming round anymore.he says i'm being silly and stop worrying.how can i show i am over this,as i dont want him to feel he has to stay with me because of this.i have been in two failed marriages,he has been single,and says it doesnt bother him being single,i suppose all i have known in life is marriage and find it hard.

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A female reader, elsie United Kingdom +, writes (30 April 2007):

elsie agony aunti think the problem lies in the fact that youve spent alot of your adult life being one way of another being with a man.did your insecurities cause any problems before?or were you bullied by your ex,s?just wondering if that could be whats causing you to have this low-self esteem?maybe you havent had the chance to stand on your own two feet and be independent for a while?if your relationship is otherwise sound try not to keep telling your fella how insecure you feel even if this is extremely hard you can try to change your behaviour otherwise you could end up losing him.

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A female reader, cd206 United Kingdom +, writes (30 April 2007):

cd206 agony auntIt's not surprising you're insecure about relationships ending after two marriages failing. I think everyone gets a little insecure about relationships and there's no magic quick fix. The most important thing to remember is that insecurity could ultimately be what breaks you up if you allow it to continue. Nobody wants to be in a relationship with someone who can't let them out of their sight just in case they leave. Try to relax. I understand why you would be unsure about whether your relationship will last or not but you need to relax to give it a chance to work.

CD

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