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age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: I'm 14 . my bf is 17 . one question , is this wrong ?we are both in love w / each other ( told each other in october ) and want to have sex . both our first time . question # 2 , I too young ? we've been together for the 2 nd time in august . 1 st time was in feb 09 and broke up because we never saw each other .3 rd question : he's Muslim and I'm catholic . Muslims aren't aloud to date by their religion . what are opinions on this ?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): Religion is important when it comes to sex. I don't know how devote you two are, but I will say that you are still young, too young to have sex. I'm a little more hard on people when it comes to expressing "love" because I don't believe sex is the only way or "best" way to express love. I think you should re-evaluate your motivations for having sex with your boyfriend.
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male
reader, Euphoricpoison  +, writes (2 May 2010):
hey acording to the law it's wrong. If I were you I would wait, Im a guy and men love sex, you dont want to do somthing you regret, and if you start young, then youll prob end up having more sexual partners, and 14s youn. Virgins turn guys on, save it till you're absolutley sure hes the one. But up to you, my first time was nothing special and I dont really think about it anymore, I just couldnt wait to have sex, and I still dont really care who my first time was with, or anyone I really been with, Im on to the next one!!!!
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A
male
reader, EDLion  +, writes (2 May 2010):
 Man, you're 14??? Dang....... Well at least you're not like me(you wouldn't wanna know). Anyways, no, believe me, living 17years in a muslim country told me so. Just think: you had sex, got discovered by boy's family, you're forced to be married to him, you'll be forced to covert to islam, no pork for ya, no alcohol for ya, 5 prayers a day for ya. IT'S GONNA DRIVE YOU CRAZYYYYY! 'sigh'
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female
reader, Redd_Extacy +, writes (2 May 2010):
 Well to tell you my honest opinion,when i was 14,i thought i was in love to but now that im older, i look back on it like that feeling i had was nothing but puppy love..you're only 14...you should wait to have sex..wait until your body developes more..if he really loves you,he would wait..im 17 and i just lost my virginity n August
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): Question #1 : No, that is not wrong, just inappropriate. The older you are the less age matters because by then both partners are mature. But at your age, you are at an entirely different level of maturity and life-phase than your boyfriend.
Question # 2: You are also way too young to be thinking about having sex. The fact that you even have to ask the question proves that. When you are ready, you know without a doubt. It's something you've thought about, not something your boyfriend brings up so you just decide to go along with it because you think it will keep him from leaving you. You also are ready when you're ready to accept the consequences of having sex. Are you at a stage in your life where you can accept having a baby? I think not. You're still a baby yourself. You don't have the money, the education, or the maturity to raise a child at 14. I read somewhere that raising a child from birth until they're 18 costs on average about $180,000. That's $10,000 a year. And that is not taking into consideration them wanting to get a iPhone or go to an expensive school like Harvard or Yale. Don't believe the hype; condoms do not always work. And you still need parental permission for birth control, which also is not 100% fool-proof. So... you're to young! :)
Question ## : Also, I am a Christian and I dated a Muslim man for four years. If you aren't mature enough to have your own opinion about it, maybe you should take some time off from dating him. When you love someone, you don't care what other people think. Don't string him along. He deserves better than that. If you are not comfortable with the difference of religion between the two of you, then you're not ready for a relationship that is that complex. You should tell him this and let him move on so that he can find someone who is comfortable with his religion and accepting of him as he is, no matter what other's think.
Don't be in a rush to grow up. Take your time and enjoy the ride. But listen to your heart and be responsible along the way; you'll enjoy where you end up when you grow up all that much more if you do. :)
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (1 May 2010):
 The real question you should ask yourself is:
Am I old enough to handle the RISKS of sex?
Meaning, are you old enough to be a mom? Are you old enough to deal with the burden of herpes or another STD?
Are you old enough to handle the emotional damage that will happen when this relationship ends?
The fact that you're looking at the Catholic/Muslim thing is evidence that you do in fact consider your future, and that's really good. That will be a road block in getting more serious, primarily because of the families involved.
You have lots of time, don't have sex now. You are too young to spin the Russian Roulette wheel.
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A
female
reader, rambini  +, writes (1 May 2010):
 In theory the age gap is fine, though with you being under 16 it matters slightly more.
14 is too young yes, apart from anything else your bf could get arrested for statutory rape. If he loves you he will be willing to wait.
His religious beliefs may cause problems with his family further down the line, but if you are both happy there is no reason you can't date.
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