A
female
age
26-29,
*ookie Jar..x
writes:I've know this one guy ben for about half a year and we've become really good friends and i found out he fancies me but is moving to london in 2 months but wants to go out with me, and i don't know if i want a long distance relationship and i'm still not sure how much i like himAlso this other guy will i went to middle school with suddenly has got back in contact with me and we talk all the time and meet up. I also found out that he fancies me. But i've never thought of him like that.I don't want to hurt anyones feelings.But i think that i may like this guy tom who i met through will, apparently he quite likes me.Will and tom and ben have asked me out recently and i have said no to ben and will and asked tom if we could wait and get to know each other better.Would it be wrong if i do go out with Tom as i was introduced to him by Will!(used fake names)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2010): I don't think you should stay single just bacause all of these guys fancy you. If you had dated these guys, it would be different, because the situation is always really complicated if you date a friend of your ex's.
But you don't have any obligation towards these guys, you may not want to hurt their feelings but it's just silly to give up a possibly good relationship for something like this.
You may want to make sure though that this Tom guy really is the one you like the most, because it might get messy if you change your mind after already dating one of them.
The fact that Will introduced you is just an unfortunate coincidence, don't let that keep you from going out with him!!
I hope you will find out what is right for you and become really happy :) Good luck!
A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (24 July 2010):
 Hello, why not remain single until you find a boyfriend in less complicated circumstances who you are certain about. The one is going away soon, the other you are not attracted to and the third one you are not too sure about. It is nice to be attractive to boys and I understand you probably like the attention as most girls do! However, it doesn't mean you have to date any of them. It is nice to have male friends. Teenage romantic relationships often fizzle out pretty quickly so if you value their friendship keep it for what it is.
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A
female
reader, johannabanana  +, writes (24 July 2010):
 Not really, if you don't return the feelings to your friend then who can blame you? Just be with who makes you happy and your friend will get over being upset. Would it still be long distance with tom though? You may not want to make that commitment. Being with someone who lives by you would probably end up making you happier, so be sure not to over look the cuties you live near.
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