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female
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anonymous
writes: I've been going out with my boyfriend for over 4 years now. Recently Ive been looking for another job, and may have found something in another town, which means I might have to move. He works all over the country, so I assumed that he wont have a problem moving with me, as this wont affect his work at all. When I asked him what will happen if I have to move, he replied, " I Dont know" . I asked him if he will move with me, and he said "I Dont know if I can" What does this mean. I was furious and haven't spoken to him since. I might not even get the job, but the whole idea of him still "not Knowing" after 4 years freaks me out. He says I'm looking for excuses to dump him, I think I'm looking for excuses not to. I also have a daughter from a previous relationship, so I need to think about whats best for her and me. What should I do about this guy? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Hag +, writes (12 January 2007):
I agree wholeheartedly with Shandy Pop. This guy is a loser because he is not man enough to end it on his own and will force you to end it and, therefore, make you look like the 'bad guy'. Who really cares?! Show your daughter how to deal with these kind of jerks now. Set the example that you don't to cling to any man and you must follow your dreams. If a guy is true to you and who you are, he will either join you, compromise with you, or follow soon after, when he realizes what he has lost. (Men are usually always too little too late) You may also find that by holding on to this loser for too long you may miss out on some important opportunities. Even if you don't get that particular job, do not let this man's lack of consideration put your life on hold. We do not get younger with time.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2007): I think He is looking for excuses to dump you actually. If you two are in love and have been together for 4 years you would expect him to automatically come with you. He is trying to turn things around so that you look like you are trying to finish with him. You have to think about you and your child. Talk to him and ask him just what he meant by it. If things are not sorted out then just move on. Your child and yourself are the most important things in your life. Some people can turn things around and i think that is what is happening here.
Take care
xx
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