A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have lost of faith in men, I feel so stupid, I have just found out that this guy who I have just starting seeing has multiple "girlfriends", I had no idea and I poured my heart out to him about my past and why I was so shy and scared to commit and he was amazing, he doesn't know that I have found out but the thing that annoys me the most is that all the other girls are young than me, really good looking and all have good careers or are going to have and I am average looking and don't really have a good job, I feel like he was just taking me for a fool all along, he always wanted to go further with him but because of my past he understood why i didn't, I feel so lucky that I didn't go to far with him but I feel so stupid at how far we did go, I thought that a guy who is 29 would have grown out of playing the field. Are there any decent guys out there who just want a normal girl, someone who is just normal.
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (12 July 2010):
Yep. I'm one. And I got lucky thankfully. But there are other guys too. I'd suggest two things here.
1 - You need to spend time alone just now, really focusing on yourself. You seem to be suffering from very low esteem, and if there's one thing that bad guys will prey upon, it's a woman with low esteem. Don't be afraid to step back and just really focus on your own life. You don't need someone in it to make you happy and complete. A parter should come into your life and add to what is already completed. Focus on yourself for now, get back out there with friends and do what you want. Show the good guys that you're a girl who isn't dependent, but who can really add to their lives and who expects outstanding treatment. When they see you're a fun person, who is 'normal' and confident enough not to need them, they'll come to you.
2 - Look closely at the type of men you're attracted to. You might be attracted to the 'show and tell' type, as I like to call them. They try to show you nothing, but their subtle actions tell you everything. You said you were shy, and suddenly he was amazing. He took advantage.
Don't give up. Just spend time on yourself right now.
A
male
reader, Sorcerer +, writes (12 July 2010):
Yes, there are some of us out there!
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