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Are other people’s contractors like this?

Tagged as: Flirting, Social Media<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 November 2018) 5 Answers - (Newest, 26 November 2018)
A female United Kingdom age 51-59, *ummy1 writes:

Hi I am in my early 40s and recently been having some work done on my house. Had a very helpful guy doing the job and while the work has been done we were messaging each other in the evenings just generally.

He mentioned that he 'would always be at my disposal' and that 'He liked to be hassled' and gave a banterful 'I will give you a good rate' wink and not being brilliant on emojis I sent him three love heart in the eyes emojis to say that I loved what he had done and he reciprocated (have a feeling I sent the wrong one). He had been working with his mate doing the various jobs and then after he finished the other day I bumped into him in thr local pub and he said 'I am going to take a photo of you and me and send it to my work mate to wind him up so he sent it saying look who I am having a beer with'.

He is a lovely guy but found asking for the photo a bit odd but I may be old school as I don't ask people to have a photo with me like that.

Assuming other people's diy people are like this.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2018):

Thank you to all the people who have replied about this.

To the anonymous female reader, this was all done naively otherwise I would not have posted about it. Whilst I am an older person I was so happy to get the work done after being messed around by other contractors quoting or never replying and i was so pleased with how better it looked that's where I was stupid sending the love heart emojis and it was intended for the work only! I didn't send love hearts to him thankfully I thought the ones in the eyes was the safer option and apologised after when I thought I had gone over the top with them. As for why didn't I put it on the diy page- I didn't know there was a page regarding this on here.

I have taken on board everyone else's sensible comments thank you as I thought the photo was more odd than anything and will now back off slowly until he has got the rest of the work done and I will ensure that I am not around while it is done.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2018):

I wait until the all the work is done before changing from my "strictly-business" face to my "I'm eternally-grateful" face.

Contractors can be clever, unprofessional, and sometimes scammers. It's best to get your work to completion before you start hanging-out with him.

Next time you see him, tell him he's still under hire; and you want the best work possible. Then stop flirting. The only time you should be visible or audible is when you're reviewing the work and discussing terms of payment.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (25 November 2018):

Honeypie agony auntNope, I certainly do not TEXT with the people that come fix stuff at the house. I don't flirt or send emojis and whatnot.

My issue would be whether he is married and... if this is really his "normal" behavior with women customers.

I would find it kind of sleazy and creepy, personally.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2018):

No! This is way past the normal contact most people have with their D.I.Y. man.

They don't send emojis or messages.

They don't offer them coffee or tea unless they can keep them out in the garden because newspapers have spread the idea for years that it is an open invitation for sex.

Thats what he thinks your offering and thats why he is bragging.

And don't expect romance.

How could you ever be his missus if he went out every day on jobs!

How could you trust him and how could he ever trust you?

So I would tone it down a bit or you are stepping in hot water and this guy may easily get 'hit-on' by up to ten females a day depending on how hard working he is!

Don't you ever see the kind of stuff men big themselves up about because you sound remarkably naive for your age?

All his jokes mean he's up for sex and you say very innocently 'is this normal!'

No!

Not unless you want to be a casual fantasy quickie.

And the talk of the pub you just happened to meet him in.

And just happened to send love heart emojis to.

No, No and No!

Know what you are doing and when you are doing it and stop encouraging him and pretending you don't know what you are doing.

No, let this nan have his normal working day and don't cry 'rape' and send him to jail.

And no, we are not your alibi, either you do or you don't know what you are doing.

This is not about housework and I see you didn't send it to a D.I.Y.

page.

I hope he comes to his senses and puts you down because he has to much D.I.Y to do.

Are you for real?

Or is this a workmans prank problem because life is getting dull?

No, not normal.

Not at all!

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A male reader, no nonsense Aidan United Kingdom +, writes (25 November 2018):

Not really. Hard to tell if this is friendly or flirtatious but it’s certainly going above and beyond the call of duty. The question is what you want to do about it. If you’d rather not take this further, ease up on the contact when the work is done and in the meantime keep it to business. Otherwise, why not go for a casual drink or something and see where it goes?

I wish you all the very best.

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