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Are man boobs a deal breaker or not?

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Question - (9 February 2011) 12 Answers - (Newest, 9 March 2011)
A male United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

hi girls if you met a guy who you found attractive and he done it for you in all ways but you take off his shirt and see small man boobs(i had a picture but the mods wont let me link them) ala the size of a teens early breast growth,you can only notice them when the shirt is off but they are definetly there,

on a skinny or average sized guy

what would your reaction be? girls please be honest

thanks

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 March 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

thanks guys im just gonna get surgery for me as i just get paranoid about the lumps in my shirt sometimes

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2011):

My boyfriend has them and he is very self conscious because of it. In fact he refuses to take his shirt off in front of me. And usually keeps a shirt on when we make love. He smokes a lot of weed and according to research that lowers testosterone in men and they begin to grow boobs. So I believe that is the cause. Other men get them from significant weight loss or gain. Ive also noticed a lot of older men have them. My bf is in his early 30's. It doesn't turn me off but the fact the he's so uncomfortable makes me uncomfortable. I have to be careful when wr cuddling not to rest my head on his chest or touch him there. Awkward.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2011):

my ex had them he wouldnt take his vest off 1 day he was drunk and he took them off i didnt even notice (i wasnt drunk btw) when we woke the next day he was moody and asked was i disgusted by them i said no but he was always very uptight with me, and began to avoid sex with me they are not that bad get over them,

if you get surgery get it for you and knowbody else

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy + , writes (15 February 2011):

CindyCares agony auntDo ask for time off and don't worry about people knowing, there's nothing to be ashamed, first, it's not your fault, second, it's a medical condition ( abnormal enlargement of mammary glands ), you are taking care of a physical problem, not just wanting to look better ( which it's your right to want, anyway ).

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A reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

i made an answer to this a week ago dont know where it went but the gist

yes they are gynecomastia,males seem to notice them more then girls or are just more rude)

i havent allowed my self to get into a relationship because of it and i endulge in meaninless sex(ussually drunk) (no complaints),or with overweigth girls from the internet,

i do want surgery its just i cant get the time off without my boss telling everybody why(and my job is heavy lifting)

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy + , writes (9 February 2011):

CindyCares agony aunt I think Sammi Star and perhaps other posters may have missed the point of my post, which is :

a skinny guy with man boobs is quite possibly someone who has

gynecomastia. "True" gynecomastia ( meaning not the one that comes from an excess of body fat ,or use of steroids). It's a condition that in time may bring other problems than just in terms of looks, so consulting a specialist for advice is always a good idea ,beside and beyond aesthetical amelioration.

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A female reader, sammi star United Kingdom +, writes (9 February 2011):

sammi star agony auntPlease don't feel that you should resort to surgery over this! While I appreciate that may be an option for some people I really think it's a desperate last resort.

Putting your time and effort into learning to love your body would be a much better use of your energys.

Nearly every single woman on this planet will have her own insecurities, weather that be a bit of a tummy, thinking her bums too big, wobbly arms etc...We understand that men aren't perfect and we don't expect them to be! Be real, be yourself and love yourself. You're gonna do just fine :)

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy + , writes (9 February 2011):

CindyCares agony aunt You ask honesty , and I'll be honest : it's unattractive.

Said by the mother of a guy who has the same problem , so if even mom says it does not look that good - it does not. My son is getting surgery for this in a few weeks. Supposedly, it is an uncomplicated operation and will only leave modest scarring. I'd suggest you to talk to an endocrinologist and see what he says.

Because , since you describe yourself as skinny/average, then it probably is not just a deposit of " baby fat " which will go away with diet and exercise. It could be ( as it is the case with my son who is a rather lean, muscular guy ) a disfunction of the mammal gland that along the years may increase and give not only esthetical but also functional problems.

So, it may be best to ask a doctor advice about what to do.

Said that , it is also true that nobody is perfect and a little imperfection like this won't scare away a girl who is already into you. At least, did not scare away my son's girls :). But if it makes you feel self conscious at the gym or at the beach etc.- it is an imperfection you can do something about.

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A female reader, sammi star United Kingdom +, writes (9 February 2011):

sammi star agony auntWouldn't bother me. If you like a guy enough to be taking his clothes of then you sure as hell aren't going to care about a minor detail like this! :)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2011):

Both women and men have fat there. Not all men have a lot of pectoral muscle.

What would be my reaction if the guy I liked and found attractive took off his shirt in front of me?

I would probably try to jump him...I probably wouldn't sit there and compare him to a football player.

You already said you find him attractive and he's done it all for you...he sounds great, so why pick him apart?

You probably would feel objectified and indignant if someone said about you:

"She's nice and all, but her t*ts look like my grandmother's."

If you really do like him, you shouldn't mock his body this way. If you don't like him, find someone with pecs to make you happy.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2011):

In my opinion, if the guy is right in "all other ways" then who cares. I'd probably just make a joke out of it and move on. I don't think it is personally a big deal, although I can see how some girls would find it a little disturbing.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2011):

Nope. I'm considered "beautiful" by a lot of the boys I've met. My boyfriend is a bit overweight. He has little man boobs (lol so awkward to actually type...) and although he's really self conscious about it, doesn't bother me in the slightest.

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