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Any advice on ending this relationship?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Faded love, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 July 2014) 3 Answers - (Newest, 25 July 2014)
A female Canada age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I started talking to this girl a little over a month ago online. we seemed to get along well have some similar interests so i asked her to meet. i didnt feel any sparwhen we metks or anything but i figured thats just because we are still just getting to know eachother. so we had a few more dates tho furthest we've gone in with th sex side of things is a kiss on the cheek. we both bi girls and neither of us have had a girlfriendbefore. but i know i'm bi because i've had serious romantic feelings for girls. when i asked her how she knew she said she knew when she had threesomes with her friends. she also has talked about her abusive ex boyfriend and another ex who cheated on her, who she still lives with and shares a bed with. she's also talked about several "hot guys". even though i was unsure, when she asked me to be her girlfriend i said yes. but as soon as i did she asked if she could post it on facebook so guys would leave her alone. all this makes me wonder if she is more interested in just being able to say she has a girlfriend rather than actually interested in me. i want out because the spark is just not their but she's been hurt before and sufferes from depression and its not that i don't care about her i just don't see us working and the uncertainty of her feelings/ intentions is really off putting. Any advice on ending it?

View related questions: facebook, has a girlfriend, spark, threesome

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A female reader, abeautifulday Canada +, writes (25 July 2014):

It sounds a little weird that she is still sharing a bed, and an apartment with her ex, she could see in you the savior she needs out of her past bad relationships. However, I think you are little too young to be anybody's savior. In this stage of curiosity, its better to be with drama free girls to explore your sexuality. It does seem a little weird that she wants to post her status on the internet immediately. I would ask her why she is doing that, until she also solves the situation with her ex boyfriend, I would refrain from getting serious with her.

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (25 July 2014):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntMaking the break from a potential friendship/relationship that you have figured isn't going anywhere.... is much like jumping in to a pond that you KNOW is cold water.

For the pond, you hold your nose, jump in, and anticipate that you are going to be submerging yourself in some COLD water....

For the friend-/relationship, you prepare what you have to say - which includes something like, "I just don't think our friendship/relationship is OK.".... and you open your mouth and spill it....

Good luck....

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A female reader, Mistresskiki United Kingdom +, writes (25 July 2014):

It has been a month, not a year. Just tell her honestly that you like her but that is as far as it goes.

Even if she does have depression, it will not hurt her for any significant amount of time; certainly not as much as if you string her along for weeks or months trying not to hurt her. You do that and the hurt will be more.

Go out on a date, and tell her clearly that it isn't going to be more than a deep friendship and leave it at that.

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