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Another girl bought my boyfriend an expensive Birthday gift and I feel jealous!

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Three is a crowd, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 June 2008) 7 Answers - (Newest, 18 June 2008)
A female age 30-35, anonymous writes:

My bf's birthday was last Thursday. I didn't have much money, so I bought him 3 sets of cheap guitar strings. He needed guitar strings, and he really doesn't care about quality as he always ends up breaking them anyway. He himself doesn't like buying expensive ones... anyway.

He went to this party his friends put up for him that night. I didn't go, because I didn't feel like going out. This one girl, who he said has a lot of money and is engaged, bought him a bottle of expensive liquor. Rum. He really likes rum. I only knew she had given him a bottle of rum, but not that it was expensive, fine quality rum.

Until Saturday. We went to another of his friends' birthday party, and the girl that bought the rum to my bf wasn't there. But all his other friends knew about the "expensive rum" he had received. They all started asking about this, and talking about how great that rum was, blah blah... my bf of course was thrilled to have received the rum.

And I feel jealous, because he only thanked me for the present I gave him, but I think he liked the rum better. I'm not jealous that this girl may be after my bf, she's engaged and plus she has a lot of money and my bf said he doesn't like girls like that, because he said she's always talking about expensive things and ridiculous stuff. But he talked about the rum, and what a great gift it was. Plus all his friends knew about it. I bet he didn't even tell them about the strings I gave him. I was short on money anyway, but I mentioned how I felt inadequate after he received this expensive rum and he said I was nagging and making a big deal out of nothing.

Do you think I should feel this bad? I feel as he didn't appreciate my gift. Only because I can't afford some stupid rum. Makes me feel like never giving him any other presents!

View related questions: cheap, engaged, jealous, money

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2008):

More to the point....."U didnt go to his birthday party because you didnt feel like it? " At least the other girl turned up. Its not about the presents its about being there and sharing his day with the people he cares about and you didnt go, because you didnt feel like it...hmmm

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2008):

More to the point....."U didnt go to his birthday party because you didnt feel like it? " At least the other girl turned up. Its not about the presents its about being there and sharing his day with the people he cares about and you didnt go, because you didnt feel like it...hmmm

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2008):

Maybe next time you should save up your money and buy him a better present, than you wouldn't worry about someone buying him something better than you.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2008):

ok now think of that situation but 1 of his male mates gave it to him and he talked about it....would it make any difference?

if it doesnt then maybe he was just talkin bout the rum coz every1 can relate to it seeing as its alcohol and can understand its value....maybe he didnt want to embarass u about u only being able to get him strings...he thanked u for them and he understands ur money situation..

basically..yeh ur making a big deal out of nothing..its just a present and u said so urself that she always buys expensive stuff....

i dont see any reason to be jealous

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A female reader, countrygirlWV United States +, writes (17 June 2008):

countrygirlWV agony auntMy opinion just brush it of. Ya know its nothing much to worry about it he doesn't like her and that was the end of it.u made the effort to get him something he likes the exspesive stuff shouldn't matter to neone just the fact u care enough does. But I would just ignore it and notworry about it. I bet he did apretiate it and if ur not satisfied just ask him "did u really like the gift I got u" I mean if u tell him how u feel he should understand. But like I said my opinion just don't worry anout it.

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A female reader, yourwifey United States +, writes (17 June 2008):

I'm sure he liked it but if shes engaged i wouldn't worry too much just give him like amazing sex i bet she didn't give him that ;P im sure he didn't mean to hurt your feeling by talking about it o his friends guys can be mean without even knowing it he might not have realized. Just try not to act too jealous some jealousy is cute like you care about him but they don' like overly jealous women.

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A female reader, misfitschik66 Canada +, writes (17 June 2008):

misfitschik66 agony aunt i think you are thinking to hard hunny lol its just "rum" its the thought that counts no need to be jealous there are plenty more times to give presents and there are plenty more gifts out there to give

as far as the rum goes guys are just like that its not personally from who it was from but the fact that they can use it to get drunk

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