A
female
age
30-35,
*grlygo
writes:my bf decided after I acted like a jerk in response to him acting like a jerk that he is having doubts about moving in together. it has been six long years that i have waited on him... proving to him i love him and want to be with him... but now if i screw up a little 2 hours worth... he is having doubts? I told him then you need to go and find someone you don't have doubts with. Cause after 6 years of being there and waiting for him and he has doubts he needs to move on and so do i. We both have children which he is sayin is a huge factor which wasnt before the fight. they are all teenagers and mine are not. am i wrong? isn't it time to move on?
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female
reader, Ask oldersister + ♥, writes (1 November 2009):
 It's normal to have some doubts when you are a single parent and considering merging two families since there is more at stake- you are making life decisions for other people than just yourself, your kids. However, after 6 yrs, you should have a good idea if the pros outweigh the cons and be able to move forward quite confidently or know by now if it simply isn't going to work.
I tend to think he's using his kids as an excuse at this juncture- as teenagers, these kids aren't as vulnerable as they were 6 years ago when you first started seeing him. I agree with you and sounds like he's picking fights in order not to step up to the plate. Since your children are younger, I'd be real hesitant to move forward on your end with all his doubts- your children may pick up on any hidden resentment and an unstable commitment on his end. If I were you, I wouldn't waste any more years on someone so unsure about me. To me, it seems like your boyfriend is comfortable in the vagueness of your relationship.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2009): yes id say its time to move on, if he still isnt sure after six years then you are not the one for him, when you said that before the fight the children were not a factor- the fact that they are now says that he is looking for a way out.
leave this man and find someone who can commit to you.
once you leave he will probably chase after you, but do not take him back, otherwise you will find yourself in the same situation as before.
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