A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:My friend and I recently tried having sex. We had sex about 2 years ago when i first met him, but we never mentioned it again since it was in a drunken haze. Sorry for the graphic content:This time around he was hard in the beginning but as soon as we tried getting it in, he got soft. I tried giving him oral but it didnt help. He had a few drinks earlier it might be to blame, but i do recall him having the same problem 2 years ago when we frist had sex. he later claimed it that he got soft as soon as i mentioned him wearing a condom, which is true. He got soft after he put the condom to go in. I refuse to have sex without a condom tho. could i be to blame? was it the alcohol perhaps? I dont know how to ask him without offending him, or putting pressure on him..thanks for your replies oxox
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, satindesire +, writes (3 April 2009):
 DO NOT allow him to pressure you to have sex without a condom. He is probably not used to wearing one at all (more the shame for him, in my opinion). If he starts masturbating with a condom, and you give him oral with a condom on, eventually he will get used to the sensation of wearing a condom during sexual activity and will be able to keep his erection just fine.
Also, may I suggest you both forgo alcohol before sexual activity? Alcohol can haze and impair your judgement greatly, even just one drink can make you forget condoms, forget birth control, and do things you otherwise would not do while sober that would would regret in the morning.
A
male
reader, Jamer70  +, writes (3 April 2009):
 His "condition" sounds like nevousness on his part. He is young and will get nervous when having sex.
Its not your fault just an issue that happens sometimes.
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