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Am I right to feel this way that my son's friend's mother didn't acknowledge me?

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Question - (17 August 2019) 7 Answers - (Newest, 18 August 2019)
A female United States age 30-35, *Mead writes:

Hello People!!! Okay so my 6 year old son plays Pee wee football. Their is a friendly competition between him and his teammate A as I will call him. Basically A’s mom and my husband have communicated hear and their about the boys and how they can help improve one another. I am always with my daughter at cheer practice so I am not around until the end of my son’s practice. So today I was with my husband and she approached asking for his contact info so our son could attend her son birthday day. She didn’t even introduce herself to me nor did she acknowledge me and I know she knows that’s my son and husband because she has seen us plenty of times before. She was with her significant other and my husband introduced himself to him yet she still didn’t acknowledge me and I didn’t because I was in that attitude from when she first approached us. Am I wrong for feeling the way I do about how she didn’t introduce herself or acknowledge me????

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2019):

Mom's usually introduce themselves to the mothers of the kids their kids hangout with. Maybe she's feeling you had the chance and never took that step. You have seen her before.

You experienced a case of bad-manners on the part of both your husband, and the other mom.

The two who knew each other had the responsibility to introduce their respective partners. If she doesn't want to know you, fine; but you're an adult, and you should rise above the situation and be polite anyway. You will be setting a better example for the boys on how to behave properly in social-situations. Even when others are stupid, rude, and have no manners.

Unfortunately, this is now beyond the time-frame to be offended. You should have introduced yourself, with your hand outstretched, at the time you met. It's far too late to have an attitude about it now, and it's petty.

You'll have other opportuniies to say hello and introduce "yourself" the next time. Some people lack the social graces, and it's left up to you to show them how it's done. It's no big deal.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (18 August 2019):

chigirl agony auntIm with Cindycares on this one. Your husband was supposed to introduce you. And when he did not, it was just as rude of you to not introduce yourself as it was of her. But I still think this matters little. I often forget the formal introductions myself, besides, maybe she was in a hurry and did not notice you. If it mattered to you, you should have just introduced yourself, in my opinion.

I have also experienced, on numerous occasions, that when I do introduce myself to the company of a person I am approaching, they barely say hello back, and certainly dont get why I do it. They find it awkward. I think a lot of people find it unecessary when they arent the ones being approached, and they normally wouldnt talk to me anyway. I mean, this is your sons friends mother, who you apparently have seen on a number of occasions, yet you have never talked to before. Would you suddenly start now? Yeah, I know, common courtesy and all that, but its old fashioned to plenty of people. Unless they intend to actually speak to you later, most people dont bother with introductions.

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A female reader, mystiquek United States + , writes (17 August 2019):

mystiquek agony auntI am a very petite woman but darling I am NEVER ignored. I have no problem letting my presence be known. What was wrong with walking up, sticking your hand out and saying "Hi I am (so and so's mom/wife)??? Just because someone shows poor taste/manners doesn't mean that you need to do the same! You have a mouth..use it. Or just stand back and act silly and pouty like a child.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (17 August 2019):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntSo it was ok for YOU not to introduce yourself to HER but you feel upset in some way because SHE didn't acknowledge YOU? You are an adult with children. You need to start acting accordingly.

Are you perhaps a little insecure about the relationship your husband has with this woman? If so, you need to tackle that with HIM.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (17 August 2019):

CindyCares agony aunt Well, if we want to get formal it was your husband who was supposed to introduce you to this woman, - but anyway, yeah , let it go. Why always think the worst ; as if she wanted specifically to disrespect you or make you feel bad. What reason could she have ?? Benefit of doubt: most probably, she just wanted to get things done , nice and swift, i.e. get contacts so that she could invite your child and go back to her own stuff , and quite naturally and logically she turned to the parent she knew already. She COULD have been a bit more social , I suppose , and that would have been nicer of her ; but , being friendly is an option , not an obligation.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (17 August 2019):

Honeypie agony auntWhy didn't YOU introduce YOURSELF?

You are all miffed that she didn't make the first move, but you could have JUST as easily done so.

While her social skill are lacking here, yours aren't much better.

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A male reader, Billy Bathgate United States +, writes (17 August 2019):

Your husband and this woman know each other, it was their responsibility to introduce their spouses. She didn’t speak to you and your husband had to introduce himself to her SO, clearly her manners are lacking. But your hubby failed to introduce you. You should have taken that opportunity to introduce yourself. Your attitude was childish and accomplished nothing.

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