A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:You can read all of the details below, or you can just go off of the summed up version I'll present now (I wrote out the super longwinded, hormonal female version first) ;)My boyfriend, whom I have known for nearly 10 years, been close friends with for the last 2 years, dating since May, and I am madly in love with, has tried to break up with me twice after finding out I had a one night stand with a friend of mine a month before we started dating. He admitted he was probably just jealous and that he doesn't want to lose me, and that he wants to work on overcoming this problem... he's even expressed that he wants to marry me in the Spring before he gets stationed across the country (he's an officer).So why am I so miserable? I love him, and I want him to want those things, but I don't feel like he loves me anymore since finding out about my "friend." I try to keep it together and stay strong for our conversations, but lately I find myself breaking down more and more. How can I fix this? Is it me? Or am I just really intuitive and I know deep down he doesn't love me anymore?
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (26 August 2010):
 Maybe we do need the long hormonal female version to understand. Why is he trying to break up with you over something that happened before his time and doesn't even apply to him. I can see if you cheated on him, sure but this no. It's that retroactive jealousy being jealous over the significant other's past. He can't do anything about it, it's already in the past where it needs to stay and not be brought up in the present. Now, he's stated he wants to overcome this problem and he believes you guys can get thru this, that's a really good sign. So now I don't see why your miserable, he said he wants to get over it and marry you in less than a year. Shouldn't you be happy? I would be jumping with joy waiting for the day he proposes to you. I think there is a little more to the problem than your saying. You have these doubts and questioning his love for you for another reason.
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