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Am I gay/straight/bi or confused?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Virginity<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 March 2010) 6 Answers - (Newest, 26 March 2010)
A male Greece age 30-35, anonymous writes:

hello,

i am 20 year old guy, and a virgin =/

it appears i no longer consider myself straight since i had 2 incidents (not sexually but the way that you feel about someone you just met and you want to spent every hour of your time with him), that changed my way of thinking.

what i really mean is that i do like girls but never really got aroused except from one girlfriend i had in past. But i like guys too just not all of them, i only like lets say 1% of the men i already know or seen... And the strange fact is that now I think my heart beats for one... again... But there is this girl i like too and I know her feelings are the same for me as well.

However, I am afraid to try anything with her because I think when our relationship comes to sex I won't work... :(

I am desperate and torn appart, since this guy gives me some signals and I do not want to loose him until it is proved that he is not in to me, but i want to be with a girl and feel normal.

I catch myself thinking of being with a man to be disgusting but when i am with this guy it feels so perfect the moment... ( I never felt like this with no girl)

I don't know what to do..=( what is your oppinion?

Thanks

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2010):

Thank you all for your answers.

I am trying to check the waters with the guy since that is what makes me happy right now in my life. He seems in to me but never never really gave a real sign he is gay/bi... (except one time we had a conversation for fun and I told him he is lying and so on and i threw in a little serious way that I am gay and he just replied "I always tell lies so you cant believe me... You are gay , so do I" and laughed...

=| and the whole point of having a girlfriend is pushy around here. Even my best friend noticed about how the girl feels for me and pushes me to do something (even though he and noone else knows how I feel for guys =( )

Ah.. This answer to Lonely Two from America... I was not always the quiet one in the family, most of times I was doing what was I told but I remember many times my mam and dad shouting me for being a bad boy :P I have 2 brothers of whom we were fighting almost each day together and shouting almost bringing down the house... =) I remember myself playing at school with other boys and sometimes play with the girls because they wanted a boy to be their strong man (but that was not many times) And that is all about my family, really... what I recall from my child hood..

Thank you for your answers and I am looking forward for more...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2010):

I think that maybe you just havent found that special girl to make you feel that way! Maybe one day a girl thats is perfect for you will pop up and you will think its silly that you ever thought you were gay. Or maybe you are gay but you are just hiding it because you want to be normal. I would say just sit down and give yourself time to think. You are still pretty young so you have time! There is nothing wrong with feeling attracted to both male and females :] everyone gets curious! Good Luck on finding yourself :]

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A female reader, Zoe-louisexx United Kingdom +, writes (26 March 2010):

Zoe-louisexx agony auntIf you feel like you love this guy try and think about talking to him abut it. If you feel this way about the same sex its not anything to be worried about it is normal and just the way you feel but if you like a girl at the same time then its most likely your bisexual. Talk to this guy and tell him how you feel, then if that dont work try thinking about this girl and how maybe you can talk to her about recent relashionships which still makes you a virgin and she should understand.

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A female reader, YourDestiny11 United States +, writes (26 March 2010):

YourDestiny11 agony auntI think you seem very confused. I would try things with the girl and if they dont work then you know its not meant to be. Good luck.

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A female reader, hopelessXO Canada +, writes (26 March 2010):

hopelessXO agony auntIt sounds like you might be bi-curious. Don't hide from your feelings, I did that and it didn't work out so well. Maybe you should try to test the waters with this guy. Don't rush into it though. Just start by getting to know each other and if you really feel connected to him tell him how you feel and see where things go. If not then that's alright, just keep living your life and be happy with who you are!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2010):

It sounds to me like you are. Don't worry though, it's nothing to be ashamed of. You should try it with both sex's and see how you like it. You might just end up liking one or the other, or both! Which ever It's who you are overall.

All the best :)

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