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Am I am Lesbian?

Tagged as: Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 February 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 6 February 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *lablablabla writes:

I'm 15 and I think I might be a lesbian, but I'm not sure AT ALL.

Last year, I started thinking about what it would be like to be with a girl and now, The idea of being with a man kinda seems distant. Theres only one guy I've been really attracted too, but he plays around a lot and as much as I hate to admit it, I just can't deal with that right now.

I'm not homophobic or anything, I just don't want to be a lesbian, is that normal? I've been on advice sites and they just said I'm going through a phase, but it really FEELS like this might just be me.

I'm TOTALLY FREAKING OUT HERE! I'd really appreciate some opinions.

x

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A female reader, loving arms United Kingdom +, writes (6 February 2009):

my daughter had exactly the same type of worries as you have. I told her that does it really matter?? you are not with anyone at the moment. You do not need a label to define who you are. And yes apparently it's true many people have crushes on someone of the same sex and they grow up straight. Don't waste your energy worrying babe. Just enjoy being a teenager.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2009):

No, you just want to experiment and that's normal. It doesn't mean you are lesbian. You can't really say that as you don't have much experience yet in love and relationships so give it time and then decide.

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A female reader, loopylu33 United Kingdom +, writes (3 February 2009):

Hello Hun,

Without sounding patronising you are only 15... It is not suprising that you can't be doing with the hassels of boys at the moment and prefer the company of girls... This does not make you a lesbian.

My friend is 21 and she didn't have a 'proper' boyfriend till she was 18 and as you much prefered the company her friends male or female and couldn't really except the idea of a relationship as something that she would want. This all changed with age.

I think if i'm being honest the main reason i was interested when i was your age was because it seemed the 'normal' thing to do as most of my friends had 'boyfriends'. had nothing to do with me having a great interest in boys.

As you get older your feelings may change as the boys around you mature etc. I really wouldn't pannick about it i think you are just normal and it is just a 'phase' that everyone goes through...

Most lads prefer male company to women through most of there teans.... doesn't make them gay...

Maybe try to speak to someone older that your close to a friend or family member and i am sure they will confirm the same as me. What you are feeling is perfectly normal.

I hope this has helped you and put your mind at ease... good luck and enjoy life...xx

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A male reader, ArmyMedic United Kingdom +, writes (3 February 2009):

ArmyMedic agony auntYou are young, why not wait a little while and see what comes naturally to you, there is nothing wrong with being gay, bi or any other sexuality.

It is understandable to be scared and freaking out about this, but all teenagers are scared about sexuality and relationships even if they are straight.

It is also very common for straight people (especially teenagers) to have fantasies about the same sex. It doesn't mean you are gay.

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