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Am I a girlfriend or an atm?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 February 2018) 5 Answers - (Newest, 3 March 2018)
A female Nigeria age 26-29, *iaocupid writes:

so i met this guy some few months ago for us it was love at first sight or so i thought.we kept on dating and at some point he was broke and i would give whatever i had on me without him asking.later on he got the courage to start asking for cash from me n i would stil give him.we were okay we were fine until recently when he asked for some cash from me n i couldnt give him bcos i was broke am stil broke!!!at first he stopped picking my calls and then when he started pickin up he would tell me to call him back n many other excuses.d most recent one was that he was watching a football match and that we would talk for a long period that he would call me.am stil expecting his call.i made up my mind not to call until he does.but am i a girlfriend or an atm?do i still have a bf or did i even have one?am confused and i dont know how to handle the situation

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2018):

Hi - I've been there & got the t-shirt. The thing is l was so in love I even KNEW this guy was using me for money & still kept with him. As time went on he was just so cold, never kissed me passionately, never held my hand etc etc and so I just went right off him, stopped giving him money & then the relationship ended.

I have no regrets in breaking up with him & you shouldn't either. And if he does try to contact you again - just ignore him. I did & I'm better for it!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2018):

I have 2 daughter's your age.They have rules for the men they date maybe you should use thease it might help you weed out the duds.1.He must have a very good job.2.He must own his own car and have insurance.3.He must have his own place and not live in mommy and daddys basement.4.You must have his full legal name because you will run a background check. Now if he passes thease rules he may have a chance but no sex for many months until you really know him and remember you can never change a person when they show you who they are believe it then act accordingly.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (27 February 2018):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntSweetheart, if you are asking the question then you already know, in your heart, what the answer is.

Every time you think about him, repeat (aloud or in your head, depending on where you are), I DESERVE BETTER, I DESERVE BETTER, I DESERVE BETTER.

People will only use you if you ALLOW it. Stand strong and don't allow this to happen again.

Sending hugs. You know you can do it.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (27 February 2018):

Honeypie agony auntIf you have to ask...

Then you are the ATM.

So you can decide "do you want to continue to PAY a guy to be my "so-called BF" or ... do you want to SAVE that money for the future and for YOURSELF?"

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A male reader, Been there Now over it United States +, writes (27 February 2018):

You either have no boyfriend or not much of one. But you have a mooch...that's for sure! He used you. Now you have no money so there is no reason for him to have a conversation with you. This guy is just completely disrespecting and taking advantage of you. Just hope he doesn't call you back. And if he does, do NOT give him any money and do not see him again. From now on, don't give money to guys you've only known for several months...even if you have it and he's a nice guy, money messes with relationships.

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