A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:A month ago, my boyfriend of 4 years wanted to split up. I agreed it was the best thing as I didn't want a future with him. We both said that we'd always be friends but then he started to ignore me and when we did talk was extremely nasty.Instict told me something wasn't quite right so I had asked several times if he was seeing anyone but he still said he loved me and would never see anyone. Several weeks later, I found out he had been seeing someone else before we had split up and was devestated.Anyway I didn't want anymore contact as he had lied as well as cheated but what I can't understand is that he never apologised for cheating, never wanted to remain friends and never cared enough to care how I would be feeling.How can someone love you one minute and want to have no contact with you the next minute? Why did he never care enough about how I was doing after? Why did he continue to be nasty?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2007): This also happened to be. I was with my partner for 17 years and it is a terrible thing to go through. You ex is obviously a weak person since he did not have the decency to give you closure to your face. 4 years is along time just for him to jump from one long term relationship to another. And I am sure there are still issues he still has that will make his new realtionship difficult, but hey that's not your problem. You deserve better and you will get better. What goes around comes around, so I wouldn't worry about what he is doing now. Look after yourself and give yourself plenty of time to get over this. Don't rush into another relationship, take your time.
A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (31 January 2007):
 This happened to me too a few years ago. It took ages to get over because you have no way of getting closure. The only thing that helped me was to tell myself over and over that anyone who could treat me with that little respect obviously wasn't worth my time or my tears. Keep yourself busy for the next couple of months and keep repeating that to yourself whenever you feel low. It won't make you feel completely better but it will help a bit. I'm sorry that this has happened to you.
CD
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