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male
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anonymous
writes: I'm 26 and my girlfriend is 23. We have been dating for 3 years. She is completely frigid about any thing physical. Her parents act like sex is the devil or that it doesn't exist. My question is, what do I do? Do I leave her or is there some way to help her to be receptive to the idea of even foreplay?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2008): mate ditch her, 3 years is ridiculous! i went for 6 months with my girlfriend, having had sex, she just flipped and went completely frigid. glad i finally ended that one. best of luck finding someone right for you!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2008): well ive learned that its just that u have to try to ease her into it
dont approach too strong or else itll scare her
my girlfriend is the same way but i eased her into physical "encounters"
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2007): talkin to her more turn her on n ask her to dress up n things like that start at the little things then do the big things x
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2007): u shud dump her. i mean..... 3 YEARS!!!
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A
female
reader, Juliette  +, writes (4 November 2005):
 I would be interested to know if you can talk about it with her or if it is a taboo subject. If it is, then that has to be the first hurdle. If it isn't and she is having a physical reaction out of her control then try to put less emphasis on your need for sex and more emphasis on what she can responds to even if you go away frustrated for a while. I have been in her position with my first sexual partner of 6 years. I loved him dearly, but he never gave me time to discover myself he was so quick to bang away. I never had an orgasm and didn't know how to have one, and he just called me fridgid in his frustration. Now, 30 years on I know what was wrong but he was too inexperienced to know either. I seem to be giving a similar answer to a lot of problems but the fact is you have to unlock her ability to feel sexy. Try to pack away having full blown sex for a couple of months and take that time to be close to her. Take the pressure off her to receive you and start to please her. Start by giving affection, not sex, it is different for many women. Sit in private where you have a couple of hours and see if you can do thngs like putting you hand down her bra and gently caressing her breast, or if she will allow you, lie nxt to her and just stroke her. You might have feel ready to explode but if you masturbate half an hour or so beforehand, you may feel less urgency to go too far which could frighten her off. Just go in small steps like this until she will allow you to show her how to have an orgasm by gently stroking back and forth over her clitoris with more than one finger or else it is too extreme and she may push you away. Once her hormones take over she will naturally feel she needs to spread her legs and she will be discovering what it feels like to need sex herself. It is so unfair to call these women frigid as it is not their fault. They need patience and understanding.
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A
female
reader, beenthere +, writes (4 November 2005):
why do her parents feel this way? Let the girl relax. tell her you will wait until she is ready. let her know she has nothing to be scared of. if she's never had a physical relationship before, she may be worried about getting it wrong. be gentle with her. take things as far as she will allow. try going a little bit further each time. if you make her feel comfortable and loved, she will relax more and begin to feel ready. if she has sex or, even foreplay, with you, it won't be very nice for either of you if she's only doing it because she thinks you'll leave her if she doesn't
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