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Aargh Boyfriend... or best friend???

Tagged as: Friends, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 January 2011) 2 Answers - (Newest, 1 February 2011)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

During the summer, my best friend made up a serious lie about my boyfriends best friend, so i stopped talking to her. a few months on and i'd started talking to her again. my boyfriend, of 1 year, felt like i was betraying him so gave me the choice of him or her. i said i couldn't chose so we broke on. i missed my boyfriend soooo much! we've now been talking about getting back together but he says he doesn't want me being close to my best friend. i promised him i wouldn't but i feel like i'm losing a large part of my independance and a good group of friends. i was planning all sorts of things with my best friend, such as holidays. i've now promised my boyfriend to cancel them but a part of me doesn't want to. but i also can't stand to lose him. should i stay with my boyfriend and lose my friends and all thos experiences, or should i leave my boyfriend, i'll have my friends, but i'll have the pain of never seeing my boyfriend again?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2011):

I real man who love you wouldn't tell you to choose him or your friend. I guess because I'm a feminist I believe you have a choice to make and be firm. Tell him you don't want to choose and that he is very immature to settle it down like this. He is your boyfriend not your fiance or husband to tell you what to do when you don't feel like it. Right now it might be a friend but you manage to stay together will it be a family member that he doesn't get along with? I like to believe that friends are like family and are part of the package if he wants to be with you. Remember everyone as different kinds of advice and mine is this. Sometimes its better to hear things from a stranger. Seek a random mature individual from church who you feel safe with in order to help you incase if this doesn't help you.

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A female reader, tomanypeoplehavethenameiwanthere United Kingdom +, writes (1 February 2011):

tomanypeoplehavethenameiwanthere agony auntBest friends are best, but boyfriends come and go. You will get over him, I promise. Is it worth it to lose a best friends over a boyfriend? Do you think that your relationship with your boyfriend would go somewhere, or have a future?? Trust me, you don't want to lose a best friend over a guy, because you can do so much more with best friends (shop, party... fair enough you cant kiss them! lol).

STAY WITH THE BEST FRIENDS

Or, see if your boyfriend and your best friend can get along for your sake. If not, then they are definitely not worth having.

xxx

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