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A lifestyle of just one night stands?

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Question - (31 December 2009) 2 Answers - (Newest, 31 December 2009)
A male United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Thanks for all help in advance.

Recently, my head has started acting up in spurts, as in giving me periods of strong urges to do sexual things (legal things, mind you), and to have sex w/people. Coupled w/the fact that I am awkward and uncomfortable thinking about being in an involved relationship w/anyone and I usually screw up most of the time I try, this has led me to contemplate living a lifestyle in which I have one-night stands (when older) and don't get close to anyone, which also ties in to my aspirations to become a traveling musician.

My first query is if this type of lifestyel is moral or not. I think it is, but my mother and some other members of my family don't think it's good (I'ven't talked to them about *myself* doing this but just in general somewhat philosophically), and would it be wrong to let them down after all they have done for me? And is this fair to the person I am having sex with?

Second, as I keep getting these thoughts and urges and I do not want to get any girls pregnant, especially at my age, am I allowed to buy condoms at my age, and is it ethical to carry them around just in case, or would not having them make me think more before doing anything sexual, or in other words, would having access to them decrease my inhibitions about having sex w/someone?

View related questions: condom, one night stand, period

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (31 December 2009):

First of all, well done about the contraception. I'm not sure how it works in America, but if you can get condoms, it's always best to have one than to not.

Secondly, if you want to have nothing but one night stands, then that's up to you. People will tell you it's wrong, people will tell you 'good for you'. I've been in relationships, and I haven't, and in all honesty I can say that it's better to have sex with someone you care about and who cares about you. Also, do find out what the other person is looking for. It's fair if all they want is a one night stand. It's not if she's a nice girl and is under the illusion that you care for her. That's all I can say really. Just be careful about what you do, and always have respect for the woman you're with and always use contraception.

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A female reader, lLady Soldier United States +, writes (31 December 2009):

lLady Soldier agony auntOne night stands are only for sorry excuses of guys with insecurities. Don't become just another jerk that hurts girl because there are way too many out there, and FYI those are the ones who catch STDs primarily! If I were you I would write down all of the positives and negatives about one night stands and do the same for relationships. You can always look up information about any of the questions you have on Google. Do your research and Im sure as you get older you'll figure out that being in a relationship can be very rewarding and such an exquisite sensation, and sex is much better with someone you love than with a stranger, and you will get sick of having one night stands, trust me!

Any other questions let me know.

Happy New Year!

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