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anonymous
writes: I have known this boy all my life. He is 19 and I am 17. He is my parents' friends' son and he was more friends with my brother (who I don't talk to anymore) than me. I hadn't seen him in 3 years and then I saw him working in a shop. I really fancy him now but I don't think I can tell him because I haven't spoken to him in 3 years and it really upsets me that I will never be with him. Is there any way you can think of that I can talk to him again? I can't really go up to him and start talking because he wasn't really my friend. Please help. I feel so down. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2005): why not just go up to him and say hi. then get a conversation going. like, I havent seen you in a long time.go from there.good luck!
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (14 February 2005):
 Because you're attracted to him and overwhelmed by the butterflies, you may be making more of this than you really need to. Talking to him is the same as talking to any other person. Start with "Hi! You're Jared, aren't you? Remember me? I'm Sasha. You used to be friends with my brother, Nathan." From there, you only need to ask him what he's been up to in the last couple of years since you've seen him. Tell him that you're really glad to have met him again after all this time. Ask him if he's going to university, or whether he's been working...and if so, where? Does he enjoy it? How did he pick that particular career/school?Then keep up your end of the coversation, too. Reflect back his comments and make your own, as in "It's amazing that you say you started in theatre lighting, because that's something I studied at tech." Or, "It's great that you're working here, because I work just across the street. Maybe we could meet up sometime."My point is that you don't have to feel like you need some "trick" to talking to him, just because you find him attractive. He's only human, just like you. The closer you act to your real self when you talk to him, the better chance there is of him liking the real you. And if it doesn't work out... well, sometimes life is like that. Don't worry about it, because there are lots of other men out there.Hope that this helps.-B
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