A
male
age
41-50,
*uturelawyer
writes:My fiance and I have a lot of history and we were very much in love. I started drinking, she did too, and we started fighting, a lot. we had been living together for about 5 years, together all the time, exclusively. she loves me very much and i feel the same towards her. we've had a couple of fights that got pretty bad and she would leave for a few days, and i wouldn't hear much. Recently I told her to leave my condo because of all the fighting, which i later regreted. Mind you though, that when we're not fighting, its amazing. so we slowly start to talk through email, and she starts coming over for a couple of days here and there. She is 30, doesn't have a job, doesn't have a license, has dropped out of college 4 times in the past 5 years. I became upset when she told me that she was going to a party with a group of people who I consider to be complete losers. we started arguing, and i told her to get a job and a life. the next morning she sent me an email stating that she is officially considering us to "not be together". I have been emailing her and sending instant messeges when I see she is online, but she wont respond, its been 5 days. I also called her sister's house (where she's staying) and they haven't seen her in 5 days.why won't she respond? is it that she needs time to calm down, time to get over me, time to forget and find somebody else? Its driving me crazy, i really love her. thanks for reading, i know its a lot.
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male
reader, Ponungalungb +, writes (6 March 2008):
 30 years old is kind of old to be partying and being irresponsible. No offense, but she doesn't sound like a real catch. If I were you, I'd just back off. If she doesn't want to see you, so be it. That may be a blessing in disguise.
You'll get over her and find someone more compatible . . . and leave the alcohol out of the equation. Life's too short to spend it in a stuper.
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