A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:Hiim really fed up, and have been for weeks.1. I only have three close friends, and they keep letting me downn. I would like to make more, but most of the people at school i could be mates with i dont really like.2. Ive never had a boyfriend and im nearly 14, its starting to get me down. Every time i like someone, they turn out to be idiots.3. I feel like everything is going wrong, i havent been truly happy for ages.I no this isnt much of a problem, but i would appreciate it if you could help.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2008): oh yeah, forgot, be confident!!x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2008): Don't worry about it!! At school there is way too much emphasis on these things, i didn't get my first proper girlfriend till i was 16 and people kept messing me round, until my recent girlfriend all of them have had a screw loose anyway and just got me down so sometimes it is best to go without.Also, i struggled with friend at school for years, at uni now and everything is fine, got mates, gf, and im very happy, but i was miserable and depressed for years. You will come into your own eventually, just be true to yourself. You have to be yourself and don't change who you are until you find friends who appreciate you for yourself, and the same applies to boyfriends. Best of luck, and don't get stressed, there will be loads of people in the same boat, but they wont admit it because they feel like they are the only one as well.keep your chin up and everything will work out ok.xx
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A
female
reader, SoSowhat10  +, writes (24 January 2008):
 Hmph..Sounds like me.I just be a little nicer at times but sometimes I revert back to the "chick" in the corner. Just be nice and joke around and try to get to know people. Never judge a book by it's cover. actually like being the "chick" in the corner..grew to love it in some weird way. Guys respect me and never disrespect me like they do most of the other girls and I talk mostly to allot of people but I have about 5 good friends..and allot of people I talk to on a regular basis, and as for as a boyfriend I've dated a guy for a year but ended it because I wasn't ready and probably won't be until I'm comfortable with myself and have no real insecurities that might affect my relationship..Just become more comfortable in social situations. Laugh and just try to talk to people..like ask them simple question and spark up decent conversation about things...May seem awkward for a few seconds but then can be really nice and fun.
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A
female
reader, red1982 +, writes (24 January 2008):
You say this isn't much of a problem, but I remeber being your age and it really seems like it at the time.
If you want more friends then you'll have to go places where there are more people. Are there any clubs after school that you could join? Or check your local leisure centre they always have loads of things on like gymnastics, swimming clubs, athletics etc. Is there a local youth club in your area?
I think you may have to put yourself 'out there' a little. Smile and be friendly, be quick to accept invitations of friendship and be quick to return them. I'm sure that you'll be fine. Try to have a more positive outlook on life as that is something that draws people to you naturally.
And remember the best way to make a friend is to be a friend!!
Please don't worry so much about not having had a boyfriend at your age - they will come eventually.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (24 January 2008):
 You need to be simple and accept others before others can accept you.If you are highly critical of others, you will never have any friends. Learn to like them and brushed up your social etiquettes.
We create our own happiness.We cannot depend on others to make us happy.If you can make others happy , you will be happy. Do not look at self but at others.
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