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*iseOwlE

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Latest articles:

RIP Beloved George Michael

This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

27 December 2016: We lost George Michael just a day ago. He has sung me to sleep, awaken me in the morning, and told me a story as I looked out into the rain. My heart just sank when I heard the news, and I just didn't want to believe we've lost yet another one. It's ...

How do I give up someone I know is the one?

This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

13 June 2016: First off, true love endures. It can withstand challenges, mishaps, and crisis. The important thing is, the one you believe to be the one, has to feel the same as you do; and be willing to struggle to keep it together as much as you want to. See,...

May We All Find Peace And Love This Holiday Season

This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

20 December 2015: I wish to offer my most sincere wish of good tidings, good cheer, and peace in a troubled world. If we all watch the news and read social media; we would think the world has gone mad. The mass killings of innocent people. The plight of people who ...

WISHING ALL THE AUNTS AND UNCLES A VERY HAPPY HOLIDAY!

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

25 December 2014: It has been a most enjoyable year being on Dear Cupid, and reading all of your wonder articles and advice. I am very inspired by the powerful advice given by all of you, and I am proud to be amongst such intelligent and thoughtful people. I ap...

Whoa! I'm on intimate terms with my Postman!

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

7 September 2014: I was sitting down to dinner with the great guy I'm currently dating. Just casually discussing current events. One topic that arose, was the issues of privacy; and the recent scandals about hackers hacking into the mysterious "Cloud" storing the ...

This Is For The Broken-Hearted on Valentine's Day

This question has 10 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

14 February 2014: Hello,readers! Here it is again! The day you see those gigantic red symbols called valentines; which are supposed to be hearts. They don't even look like a heart. Well, if they stick a knife through it, tear a hole, then fray the edges, it will b...

How To Get Through The Holidays After A Breakup

This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

21 December 2013: It is approaching the Holidays and the New Year, and many of us ended relationships in the year 2013. Some of you have been single following a breakup for a lot longer; but you start to reminisce about the good old times, when you were all cozy with ...

Guide for adult dating

This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

2 November 2013: Ladies and gentlemen of the adult-dating world, may I have your undivided attention? We're now in the 21st century; and you need some pointers that might minimize your frustrations; and keep you sane while trying to find a date, a partner, or sp...

When will I finally get over the breakup?

This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

24 August 2013: So, you have been recently dumped. You had to dump someone else. Maybe you're still in the "no contact" phase after the breakup. Months or years have passed. There is still an ache in your heart for that person. Sometimes it overtakes you ...

Your Ex Is Sending Mixed Signals

This question has 9 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

29 July 2013: Many of us may be in recovery from a recent breakup, or you are several weeks into the no-contact period. You broke up months or years ago. There is this dull pain in the pit of your heart. You're going about your life. You relapse and cry ...

How Does The Dumper Feel After Dumping You?

This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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17 July 2013: I was dumped three months ago, not really on bad terms; I just didn't see it coming. I frequently see questions from those dumped; pleading for a way to help the pain to stop. They need comfort and a shoulder to cry on. They feel wretched and ...

I got dumped and I know how to survive a breakup and didn't know I could

This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

10 July 2013: Well, as the story goes; people all over the world in different languages, know how it feels to get dumped. Generally it stinks. In my case; there was a lot of fun. No real arguments, and being two very mature people; we are well-schooled, a...

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Is he oblivious or selfish?

Q.   Hello agony aunts and uncles It’s never a good sign when I appeal to the internet but here goes. I fell crazy in love with someone but he had a lot of financial issues. I still dated him and loaned him money which he did repay me for. Now that he’...

A.   21 April 2018: He's a broke-guy with kids. Living in a separate household and paying child-support strains a budget. Your timing is bad, and he isn't a good choice. You volunteered your financial-assistance. Whether he accepted or not; you offered in a time of ... (read in full...)

Shall I just go along with this as it is and see where it goes, or ask now what he's thinking?

Q.   Hey, so I'm 24 but pretty new to dating in general - I came out of a long-term relationship with my (thus far only) boyfriend back in September last year and only recently felt ready to start dating. In any case, I've been seeing some for the las...

A.   21 April 2018: If you're both working and/or students; maybe all the time you really have is on weekends. Why don't you take him out to dinner during the week, or plan a nice dinner at your place? If you can't cook, find-out what's his favorite carry-ou... (read in full...)

I'm still being picked on at school, one girl said its because I'm clueless.

Q.   THIS IS WHAT I WROTE BEFORE: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/please-help-me-stand-up-for-myself.html These friends are the only friends I have and when they give me the silent treatment or start rumors it really hurts! I pretty much end up begg...

A.   20 April 2018: What you're going through is called "peer-pressure." What you are now learning is that you can't please people for trying. You are also learning that everyone you call a friend, isn't! You have to inform an adult when kids over-power you. Your par... (read in full...)

My boyfriend doesn't listen when I tell him I am not materialistic!

Q.   Hello, I'm 24 and I've been with my boyfriend for about 4 years. I'm trying to get other's perspective. I come from a wealthy family, and my boyfriend think that i should be always spoiled with gifts. He's not too rich or poor, he's in the middle ...

A.   20 April 2018: I have a similar situation. My boyfriend is rich, and he likes to splurge and buy me expensive gifts. I earn a good living; and I have a lot of nice things. I also come from a family who is very comfortable; and never really had to want for ... (read in full...)

He phased me out but got angry when I moved on.

Q.   Hey :-) im sorry that this is such a long one guys. About 6 months ago I started casually dating this guy who I had known for a while. It started because he pursued and chased me and I started to like him back. He told me how he thought of me 24...

A.   20 April 2018: What's wrong with you? You don't owe anyone any explanations. It was a mutual-agreement to keep it casual; but you made it an open-end contract, where only you are the one promising not to date anyone else. Yet, you had no official-relationship; ... (read in full...)

I have an ex that wont let go.

Q.   Me and my ex girlfriend split up 4, maybe even closer to 5 years ago. In the end, she got quite nasty and I ended up blocking her on Facebook. Fast forward a few years and I get a message request from a previously deactivated account of hers,...

A.   20 April 2018: The no-brainer solution is to ignore her contact. You're a big-boy, and an adult; so she can't make you do anything you don't want to, nor can she do anything to you. She's fixated and somewhat scorned about how things ended. She has baited y... (read in full...)

My boyfriend, I and his so called lesbian friend who's slept with him, fancies him and doesn't like me. What do I do?

Q.   Been seeing a guy for 7months now. Started off casually, us both not looking for a relationship, but it naturally progressed into one that we both are enjoying. We have had to redefine and communicate a lot about what our needs and expectations are ...

A.   20 April 2018: [EDIT]: "That includes people they've dated who seem very active in his life, ex-spouses; and so-called friends, who are way too chummy for my comfort." ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend, I and his so called lesbian friend who's slept with him, fancies him and doesn't like me. What do I do?

Q.   Been seeing a guy for 7months now. Started off casually, us both not looking for a relationship, but it naturally progressed into one that we both are enjoying. We have had to redefine and communicate a lot about what our needs and expectations are ...

A.   20 April 2018: One of the things experience has taught me is to get to know and understand the existing relationships between my love-interest and their exes. That includes people they've dated who seem very active in his life, ex-spouses, and so-called friends ... (read in full...)

Why is my co-worker taking care of his female friend after she just had a baby? Does he like her?

Q.   Hello there, I am 32 years old and my coworker is 41 years old. We starred to talk around January only at work then we found out that we live 8 minutes away from each other. Our days off rotate and march 16th him and I set the date to go to lunch an...

A.   20 April 2018: You said he was made the baby's godfather; so he is fulfilling a part of his duty. He's not only taking care of her, that includes helping her with the baby. Apparently they are all close-friends; and the biological-father usually has some say about ... (read in full...)

What can I do to make my Facebook account more respectable so that my boyfriend doesn't take things the wrong way?

Q.   Hello. After a few years of being single minus one short relationship last year, I've found someone I want to get serious with. We've been dating a few months now and I've put a lot of thought into the type of partner I want to be. I've no problem ...

A.   19 April 2018: You're young and attractive, apparently. Your previous dates and pursuers are surely going to pop-up now and then. It's a small-world; and there is really nothing else you can do, but what you've been doing. Social media allows for people to get ... (read in full...)

He said he loved me but then he dumped me out of the blue! Do I just walk away and forget it all?

Q.   Hi Everyone I have a really big dilemma and don’t know what to do. Long story short. I was seeing this guy for a little over 2 months. Things were going amazing, we got along well, we wanted the same things out of life, we had many of the same ...

A.   19 April 2018: Yes, leave him alone and move on. He's wasting your time, and it seems he's trying to keep you available for sex; or when he feels like female-company. All the while his EX and HIS KIDS are really on his mind. He's also using that excuse to keep you ... (read in full...)

We're both single now and he's invited me on an adventure... is he interested?

Q.   I can't believe I'm 30 years old and asking this question, but my social skills are not the greatest so here goes. Tl;dr "does he like me?" A few years ago I met this guy in passing at an event I basically strayed into while out walking around. ...

A.   19 April 2018: By all description it sounds like he has found a friend with similar interests. Long-talks and invitations aren't necessarily leading to romantic-interests. Everything you have described is so generic, I couldn't find anything signaling ... (read in full...)

Should I be thankful for the little I've got?

Q.   Yes, mod, I’m 17. The only person I can talk to about my depression and anxiety is my boyfriend but I’m stuck in a polygamous relationship with him and his girlfriend. However, I love him and I’m getting tired of sharing him. I just want his body ...

A.   19 April 2018: I still have hope for you, because you're so young. At only 17, you will see the world from a more limited point of view; because you have no experience. Your social and/or mental-disorders aren't always the driving force behind your behavior... (read in full...)

I'm not shy but I shake when public speaking.

Q.   I have a problem with speaking to people. Sometimes it’s a new girl who is looking at my school, sometimes it happens when I am writing the answer to a question on the board in front of everyone at school, sometimes it happens during a presentation ...

A.   18 April 2018: There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Nothing some time, experience, and practice won't fix. I had that problem myself. I would sometimes go blank, freeze, and words wouldn't come-out in-front of people. I used to walk-around with my head-... (read in full...)

I'm back with my ex but sometimes he is not enthusiastic!

Q.   My ex and I were together for 2.5 years. I ended the relationship about a year ago due to his immature habits (gambling and binge drinking on weekends). After the break up we tried working on things but ultimately not enough time had passed and ...

A.   18 April 2018: [EDIT]: "It's spell-binding and neutralizes the common-sense in women."... (read in full...)

I'm back with my ex but sometimes he is not enthusiastic!

Q.   My ex and I were together for 2.5 years. I ended the relationship about a year ago due to his immature habits (gambling and binge drinking on weekends). After the break up we tried working on things but ultimately not enough time had passed and ...

A.   18 April 2018: He has to disconnect with the woman he recently broke-up with; so he needed a backup-plan. You're familiar, responsible, and still holding feelings for him. So like a stray-cat, he goes to the one person who will take him in. He doesn't have to deal ... (read in full...)

Should I be thankful for the little I've got?

Q.   Yes, mod, I’m 17. The only person I can talk to about my depression and anxiety is my boyfriend but I’m stuck in a polygamous relationship with him and his girlfriend. However, I love him and I’m getting tired of sharing him. I just want his body ...

A.   18 April 2018: My dear, being 17 is really hard. Here you are, growing and developing from a girl to a young woman. Naturally, you're actually feeling real feelings for someone for the first time. You actually know what these feelings mean; but they are still very ... (read in full...)

Is it normal to lead such separate lives, but still have a relatively strong relationship?

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for over 3 years now and we lived together for 2.5 of those years. We met through working together until I left the company 5 months of us dating (separate reasons, not related to our relationship). Anyway, I've n...

A.   18 April 2018: [EDIT]: "It seems it is, but you will notice the distance will start to widen." Oh-oh! Three to five years! The magic-period in a relationship! When you determine if it will grow, improve, and evolve to the next level; or putter-out and j... (read in full...)

Is it normal to lead such separate lives, but still have a relatively strong relationship?

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for over 3 years now and we lived together for 2.5 of those years. We met through working together until I left the company 5 months of us dating (separate reasons, not related to our relationship). Anyway, I've n...

A.   18 April 2018: I think you are a very independent self-aware woman. You feel secure about your relationship; but you have to be careful not to let work and other activities pull you apart. You have to keep your relationship prioritized; and make sure he's not... (read in full...)

Sex seems like something he's trying to get over and done with and going through the motions!

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years now and we are really happy together. He works away a fair bit and I travel frequently so we have regular LDR stints of maybe a couple of weeks or longer (up to 2 or more months). The distance isn't an issue ...

A.   17 April 2018: First-off, please don't blame yourself in any way. This isn't your fault at all. You made two observations apparent, that your sex-drive was normally higher than his; and you spend a lot of time apart. There is a possibility that during long per... (read in full...)

Am I being self sabotaging or are my feelings enough?

Q.   I feel like i'm going through a bit of an internal crisis and i can't understand why i can't just be happy. I'm 23 and only been with my boyfriend 7 months, however I knew him for a yr before that. It took me a while to take the plunge and allow ...

A.   17 April 2018: Set realistic terms for happiness. You will not feel happy and full of glee 24/7. There will be dull moments. Get a leash on your anxiety, or see your therapist until you can. Double-down on pushing your self to believe you deserve to be happy an... (read in full...)

My boyfriend doesn't tell anyone about me but wants me to move in with him ... what should I do ?

Q.   I've been dating a guy for 5 months and were exsclusive.. I'm finding myself in love with him he treats me well except for one issue he doesn't tell anyone about me, not friends which he only has a few not co workers not his family... He tells me ...

A.   17 April 2018: Don't move in with him. He's the type of guy wants the kind of female who will cook, clean, do his laundry, and take care of him. He will hide you from everybody and isolate you from your family. He will control you and treat you like his ... (read in full...)

How do I handle my girlfriends past?

Q.   I would like to start out by saying that I consider myself very open minded. I am divorced from a 6 year marriage and am on good terms with. I have even made good friends with my ex-wife’s boyfriend and we hang out occasionally. My current ...

A.   17 April 2018: Men who suffer retro-jealousy and judgmental-sexist issues about purity in women are difficult to advise. They first accept the woman; then later down the line decide to go on this trip of self-righteousness; and climb-up on some high moral-ho... (read in full...)

Why is she so attention seeking??

Q.   Yesterday a 44 yr old female work colleague with 5 kids had her wisdom teeth out,she posted a post surgery selfie of her swollen face on our works fbook page, Is this pure attention seeking? She’s a quiet and good worker, invisible.. like...

A.   17 April 2018: It's common nowadays for people to share their experiences, even if it's a medical procedure. Sometimes not necessarily for attention; but they need support and empathy from family, friends, and colleagues. A reason not to be invisible. Not facing ... (read in full...)

My hsband left me for another woman but wont considera divorce.

Q.   My husband left me with other woman his (mistress) it's been 2 weeks now since he left. I'm 37 yr old My husband is 54 and his mistress is 45 year old she's older than me . I want to divorce him coz I don't trust him no more . But my husband ...

A.   17 April 2018: You will have to file for what's called a contested divorce. You're the one who wants to file for the divorce; so you will have to get yourself an attorney to file a petition in a family court in your jurisdiction. You have to get legal advice t... (read in full...)

He compliments others and insults me.

Q.   My partner of many years verbally attacked me for the things I do to 'beautify' myself such as have hair nails and skin appointments etc done . I have never had cosmetic surgery and am not going to. He says I'm insecure and he wants someone who is ...

A.   16 April 2018: Call it off. He's insensitive. Now stop and think. You wrote a post about a man who destroys your self-esteem. You're engaged to that man. Why? It will only get worse. You're not getting younger; and spending all your money for the sake of ... (read in full...)

My girlfriend left, I want to fix it but she is ignoring me.

Q.   My girlfriend of 12 years has just left me. For the last 4 years we've lived together in our own place after a spell living with her family, we moved in shortly after my father passed away. I really struggled to deal with my father's passing...

A.   16 April 2018: Even if you never laid a finger on her, you did a great deal of psychological-damage and destroyed things that she treasured. A bad childhood is no excuse for abuse and cruelty. If we know we need help; but don't seek it for the people we love,... (read in full...)

My eccentric fiance's behaviour is starting to concern me

Q.   Hi... I am looking for some outside advice/perspective on my relationship with my fiancé. We've been together for two years and are just recently engaged. When we first met, we clicked immediately and have been mostly insperable. I grew up in a v...

A.   16 April 2018: [EDIT]: "So most of the personality quirks you can adjust to." " He's not a child, and if he has to be reminded of that; you can says so in those words." I would make sure he resolves his issues with absent-mindedness. That ... (read in full...)

My eccentric fiance's behaviour is starting to concern me

Q.   Hi... I am looking for some outside advice/perspective on my relationship with my fiancé. We've been together for two years and are just recently engaged. When we first met, we clicked immediately and have been mostly insperable. I grew up in a v...

A.   16 April 2018: He's a quirky person. He does odd things around people; but he gets a positive reaction. The erotica stuff is easy to resolve. Just ask him not to share such things with other people. All done. He is agreeable and of a friendly nature. He aims to ... (read in full...)

How do I deal with bullying?

Q.   Hi, I am 16. Basically, I get bullied by a lot of people in school. I'm in year 11 now but it's been going on since year 10.It started off with a group of 4 girls, in year 10. They would patronize me, try to embarrass me in front of people to get ...

A.   16 April 2018: They are teasing and poking fun; but fighting is violence. It is only considered self-defense, if you are physically-threatened or attacked by another person. Not because they made you angry by teasing you! Based on what you've claimed; which do... (read in full...)

What are his intentions? Is he just playing around?

Q.   Dear cupid , Im a flighta attendant, ive met this guy onboard we were both very interested in eachother , we were flying to florida but it turned out he had a transit flight to another state , we texted when i had a lyover there he told me how m...

A.   15 April 2018: He's looking for sex and a casual-relationship. He can fly-in and see you whenever it's possible/convenient; but he will most likely maintain a real relationship with somebody else. If he doesn't have one already. You'll never really know. You're ... (read in full...)

Can we really be future friends respectively?

Q.   Same sex best friends for four years and we crossed the line and had emotional and physical affIr for 4 months. We are both married and won’t leave our husbands and families. We still work together and continue to have lunch and talk at work only ...

A.   15 April 2018: You need to separate and only communicate professionally. You can only emotionally-disconnect by getting out of each others way! I'm going to lay-down some tough-love. I will provoke some thought; and hit you with some harsh-reality. ... (read in full...)

I’m tempted to ask her out but fear embarrassing her!

Q.   There is a girl at my work that I have liked for years, but I never had the courage to talk to her until recently, after she asked a colleague who I was and was I single. We get on quite well but there is a little bit of shy / awkwardness when we ...

A.   15 April 2018: [EDIT]: "You and your friend are taking advantage of her inexperience and you are both way out of line. Lucky I'm not your boss! She thinks you're a couple of lecherous creeps; and you've both embarrassed her. Apparently he is not a "friend"... (read in full...)

I’m tempted to ask her out but fear embarrassing her!

Q.   There is a girl at my work that I have liked for years, but I never had the courage to talk to her until recently, after she asked a colleague who I was and was I single. We get on quite well but there is a little bit of shy / awkwardness when we ...

A.   15 April 2018: Your "mutual friend" also stepped across a line close to what is considered sexual-harassment and creating a hostile work environment for women. Maybe in the UK you can corner women and ask for numbers; because they can't run from you, or you can ... (read in full...)

The man who was my companion contacts me through my daughter after 2 years!

Q.   Hello peeps I have a question that I'd like your honest opinions about - please...? I met this lovely, magic but crazy guy in 2016. We clicked. It was very strong whilst it lasted. But he liked his drink and we both got drunk a lot and that was...

A.   15 April 2018: Come-down off cloud-nine, woman! This is something you should be warning your daughter about, not the one going down the path to destruction! Key-points and red-flags that should set-off loud sirens: "But there WAS a lot of lying from him, ... (read in full...)

Are my parents shallow for using his family’s medical history to keep me from dating him?

Q.   I know I might get judged a little here but I have to get this off my chest and I think you have to admit that it went a step too far. Since I started uni, I made a promise myself to act mature and make sure that I do the best I can in whatever ...

A.   14 April 2018: If there is one thing I know about young people your age. Their parents can say whatever they want; when you've made-up your mind to do something, you will do exactly whatever you want to do. Your mother is a human being. Human beings make mis... (read in full...)

Is he interested or not, or is he just shy?

Q.   A friend of mine has been trying for months to hook me up with a guy she knows, but I really hate being set up so I've been brushing it off. She constantly tells me how alike he and I are; we're both family oriented, determined, somewhat shy around ...

A.   14 April 2018: Your friend has basically put him on the spot, he has an opening. If he hasn't taken it, maybe you're not his type. ... (read in full...)

Is he interested or not, or is he just shy?

Q.   A friend of mine has been trying for months to hook me up with a guy she knows, but I really hate being set up so I've been brushing it off. She constantly tells me how alike he and I are; we're both family oriented, determined, somewhat shy around ...

A.   14 April 2018: Grown-men have to man-up! I don't have much patience with shyness anymore; even though I myself was once shy. I just decided I would push myself, or be lonely. He has to grow a pair and talk to you; or you should just shrug him off. It's a freaki... (read in full...)

My online guy has been professing his love for me but I've found out he has a girlfriend!

Q.   Basically I've been with a guy for 8 months and we're long distance (he's also from a different country than mine we just met in the summer) . It was his choice for us to stay together although we are far from each other and we always skype and keep ...

A.   14 April 2018: Block him, change your number if you have to, and close your account. Reopen a new one. Move on. If you don't delete or stop the messages; you'll tempt yourself to open and read them. You'll also be tempted to troll or stalk him online. You also... (read in full...)

How do I deal with bullying?

Q.   Hi, I am 16. Basically, I get bullied by a lot of people in school. I'm in year 11 now but it's been going on since year 10.It started off with a group of 4 girls, in year 10. They would patronize me, try to embarrass me in front of people to get ...

A.   14 April 2018: You will never survive being a teenager if you can't take some of the teasing. It happens to everyone. In your case, I think you are intimidated; and you don't want to squeal on them. Most kids who are bullied, don't tell anyone until it gets to ... (read in full...)

How do I deal with bullying?

Q.   Hi, I am 16. Basically, I get bullied by a lot of people in school. I'm in year 11 now but it's been going on since year 10.It started off with a group of 4 girls, in year 10. They would patronize me, try to embarrass me in front of people to get ...

A.   14 April 2018: This is part of being a teenager. You have to realize there will be kids who will go after you; when they know you let them get to you. They will continue, but there is no fun when they don't get any reaction. Truthfully, I doubt you've told any... (read in full...)

How do I deal with bullying?

Q.   Hi, I am 16. Basically, I get bullied by a lot of people in school. I'm in year 11 now but it's been going on since year 10.It started off with a group of 4 girls, in year 10. They would patronize me, try to embarrass me in front of people to get ...

A.   11 April 2018: You can defend yourself only if you are attacked. Your marshal arts teacher taught you fighting-disciplines. How to maintain control; and should have impressed upon you that your skills are potentially dangerous. It's not suggested that you fight; ... (read in full...)

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