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Student of Psychology, Degree in Nursing with wide variety of experience. Mother, daughter, sister, wife, ex, neice, grandaughter, student, boss, colleague....you get the picture.
Interested in impulse control disorders, like chocolate, cheese, Tintin, travelling, Pepsi max, Cracker, Tony Soprano, eddie Izzard, toilet humour, Family guy - shall I go on?
Adore my family and friends. Love to help others, abuse survivor, rape survivor, holder of family record for cherry pip spitting......
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I told her I wanted marriage-she went cool and broke off with me! I want her back...advice please?
Q. How can I win her back? I've been going out with this girl for almost 7 years, then out of the blue she broke up with me. She stated that she loves me, she can’t marry me and that I should find someone better then her. I stated that I’m old enough t...
A. 21 January 2007: I have to ask you...in what way have you 'changed'? You say you must convince her you have changed...
Is there some underlying dynamic that you are not going into on here?... (read in full...)
When I asked him out he said "let's get to know each other better, first". Is this his polite way of saying No?
Q. ive liked this guy for a while now (about 10 months) and he claims he liked me the same amount of time but when ever one was singel the other was taken and finally after 10 months we both single. we have flirted loads and had a few kisses. last ...
A. 20 January 2007: I think then he just wants to 'get to know you better' before choosing to make any sort of commitment to you which would involve being exclusive to each other. Go out on a few dates and see if you enjoy your time together.
Good luck.
xx... (read in full...)
If your partner was cheating...would you want to know?
Q. if your partner was cheating would you want to know?...
A. 20 January 2007: Yes, but it would kill me.......whether I would forgive or not....mmm?
**ponders**
depends on the situation and circumstances, things are not as black and white now as they used to be in my teens and twenties when I would have just dumped them... (read in full...)
Why do many females, that have been raped--become sexually active after this crime agianst them?
Q. Look Im at with young females so they ask me this question " Why does female became very sexaulity active after they been rape. So can someone please answer that question for me....
A. 20 January 2007: Female anon below, that is a good point and one that I had never considered before. Redressing the balance....becoming the instigator rather than a victim....
... (read in full...)
When I asked him out he said "let's get to know each other better, first". Is this his polite way of saying No?
Q. ive liked this guy for a while now (about 10 months) and he claims he liked me the same amount of time but when ever one was singel the other was taken and finally after 10 months we both single. we have flirted loads and had a few kisses. last ...
A. 20 January 2007: Can I ask how old you are? Plus, can I ask what you meant when you said you 'asked him out'? Only, I am unsure if you meant you wanted to go out with him on a date or as BF and GF?
Cheers.
xx... (read in full...)
I love my bf but...Is this older guy at work making a move on me?
Q. I am 17 and have been dating my boyfriend who is 2 years older than me for 7 months. I absolutely love him and don't see any other guy as possibly being right for me. However, there is a 21 year old guy I work with that flirts with me. The other ...
A. 20 January 2007: If you don't want to destroy you other relationship don't respond to any of his advances. It is really that simple. And if he asks you out say 'no'.... (read in full...)
I told her I wanted marriage-she went cool and broke off with me! I want her back...advice please?
Q. How can I win her back? I've been going out with this girl for almost 7 years, then out of the blue she broke up with me. She stated that she loves me, she can’t marry me and that I should find someone better then her. I stated that I’m old enough t...
A. 20 January 2007: I think (this is just my opinion) that she just is not sure if she loves you any more. I also believe that because you have chased her with phone calls etc)you have messed up your chances of a reconcilitation. She says she would rather not say if ... (read in full...)
Why are the muscles on one side of my neck bigger than the other side? Any ideas?
Q. dear cupid my right side of my neck seems to have more muscles at the bottom nearing the shoulders then my left side one, i would like to know is this normal or is it rare, as i have been to the doctors and he said its just muscles and did ...
A. 20 January 2007: Chances are you favour that side when you lift things, or use things like sports equipment.
if your GP and your parents both say there is nothing there you really do need to stop obsessing over it because the chances are there really is nothing ther... (read in full...)
After I found out my wife was going out kissing women, our sex-life has died and not restarted!
Q. I have been married to my wife for 19 years. We have 3 children and have had a great sex life. I started doing artwork on the computer most nights last year and she felt I was neglecting her. She started going out with friends and I started ...
A. 20 January 2007: I think this calls for professional help. Often when two individuals talk about emotive issues like this they hit a brick wall. They find themselves going round in circles and having the same argument with the same results.
Have you thought abou... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's fertility test came up with poor results... what can I say to him?
Q. Hello all please help me! Im 19yrs old. Me and my boyfriend recently took fertility tests. My result was fine but his was not. Hes finding it really difficult to cope with the fact that its a high possibility that he cannot have kids. And I dont ...
A. 20 January 2007: Why did you do fertility tests at such a young age?... (read in full...)
Why can't I experience orgasms like the girls in porn? Any thoughts?
Q. I keep watching porn and seeing these girls come loads! I mean like waterfalls of come! Is this real or fake? Why can't I do it? Thanks...
A. 20 January 2007: It might just be something to do with the fact that those girls and blokes are ACTORS!! Just because they look like they are orgasming doesn't not mean that they actually are. After all when you see Scarlett Johansson running around dressed up ... (read in full...)
I like him but he doesn't want a gf! What can I do?
Q. i want to go out wit this lad but he dnt wnt a girlfriend wat shall i do ???...
A. 20 January 2007: Nothing.
You can't 'make' somebody behave in a certain way if they don't want to, short of coercion, and that just isn't right.
Back off and let him alone. And above all don't sleep with him. If you do you will end up having all the emotions... (read in full...)
Is this guy jealous and/or 'marking his territory'? Advice?
Q. A guy I dated found out I was dating someone else, and now he is acting more interested in me. Is he jealous? Is he "marking" his territory? ...
A. 20 January 2007: Isn't this just typical? You always want what you can't have....treat 'em mean and keep 'em keen.....
I think this guy is more into the chase. But why should you have to play hard to get?
If you are into him a bit as well then why not 'date' b... (read in full...)
I only see him 2 days a week and I feel it is not enough! Any advice?
Q. hello. my drama is that i have been dating this guy for three months but he lives in new jersey and i live in new york and we both work full time jobs. i only get to see him on weekends. it seems like he reserves fridays for his friends and then ...
A. 20 January 2007: Unless the two of you are going to make a firmer commitment, and take your relationship forward I think what he and you are doing actually sounds ok. He sees his friends for one night and you for two. he works the other four, i mean, he needs a ... (read in full...)
He has an obssession with "shemale" porn! What can I do?
Q. I NEED HELP IVE WITH MY BOYFRIEND FOR TWO YEARS NOW AND I THINK SOMETHING IS WRONG LATELY IVE BEEN SUSPECTING ABOUT HIM DOING SOMETHING ON THE COMPUTER HE HAS BEEN LOOKING AT SHEMALE PORN WE HAVE TWO COMPUTERS ONE IN OUR BEDROOM AND THE OTHER IN THE ...
A. 20 January 2007: BSLD I have answered this question twice when you have PM'd me. You have also posted it on here before as well. I cannot understand why you feel the need to keep asking the same question over and over again. Unless you don't like the answers you ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my boyfriend to shave off his pubes?
Q. GUYS! do you shave your pubes? whenever i give my boyfriend a bj i get a lot of hairs in my mouth. i said he should shave but i was kidding. should i tell him to for real? i just want to know if he is just extra hairy or what?...
A. 15 January 2007: He has hairs right ALONG his penis? Or is it just that you can DT him?
Sorry, being facetious.
I think if he shaves his pubes (this is just a guess mind) you could end up with stubble rash on your face (like when you snog a bloke who hasn't s... (read in full...)
How do I tactfully tell my girlfriend... "please don't dress like such a slut"
Q. This is driving me nuts! My girlfriend dresses like a complete slut! I like a girl dressing confidently and showing some skin but this is over the top. Even her own friends make comments! I find it totally unattractive and its making me doubt ...
A. 15 January 2007: Hi Ben, I can understand you feeling like this....but I know think I know why. Are your mates making inappropriate comments about her and it is making you embarrassed? Don't develop your views soley to 'fit in' with your peer group. Let us know ... (read in full...)
We used the 'pull out' method-could I be pregnant?
Q. Pregncy question, I had sex about 8 days before my december period. Although we used a condom the second time, the first time we did not have one, and used I guess what is called "pulling out". And now I am concerned about being pregnant. I got my ...
A. 14 January 2007: Get another EARLY pregnancy test. You will never get a false positive but you can get a false negative. Some of these tests are sensitive enough to detect the hormones of pregnancy as early as a couple of days after a missed period.
To answer your... (read in full...)
How do I tactfully tell my girlfriend... "please don't dress like such a slut"
Q. This is driving me nuts! My girlfriend dresses like a complete slut! I like a girl dressing confidently and showing some skin but this is over the top. Even her own friends make comments! I find it totally unattractive and its making me doubt ...
A. 14 January 2007: I was always taught that if a girl was 'dressing up' she should show EITHER cleavage, legs, stomach OR shoulders, not all at once. It is not particularly 'classy'. But hey, I am an old fart in my thirties and time has moved on and so has ... (read in full...)
I'm not ready for motherhood! Should I have an abortion or keep this baby?
Q. Hey there! I am about less than 2 months pregnant. I am devastated. I'm only 17 and this was obviously very unplanned. I wish I could turn back time and change the fact that I had unprotected sex. I'm stuck in the middle wondering if I should have ...
A. 13 January 2007: You need to make this decision for YOU and you alone. At this present time the 'child' does not come into the equation. Anyone else who fancies 'having a go' at me for this opinion, don't bother. The woman carries the foetus and as her body ... (read in full...)
I know it makes you blind, but is this another side effect?
Q. Is it true that when you masturbate it kills thousnads of brain cells?...
A. 13 January 2007: I had read somewhere that circumcised men have less sensitivity in the glans of the penis, but not being a man or circumcised for that matter I can't give a definitive answer. ... (read in full...)
I like to please myself because I don't have a boyfriend. Am I normal?
Q. dear cupid i dont have a boyfriend so i like 2 masterbate. Am i normal? I feel weird afterwards but it makes me feel better about myself. wat shud i do? shud i stop masterbating? please help me xoxoxo...
A. 13 January 2007: It is normal.
End of.... (read in full...)
I went too far in my sexual exploration and now my girlfriend says she's lost trust in me!
Q. Ok so tonight I was in a horny mood and it was overwhelming me. My g/f, who I dearly love and plan to marry, wasn't really in the mood. We were sitting there and I started kissing and licking at her stomach and then began to move up to her ...
A. 11 January 2007: How old are you two? I would guess not very! This almost seems like a first base/second base type thing. Please can we have more information.... (read in full...)
He became a sex-machine after he proposed... huh?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have been with my BF for 9 years now and I recently hinted that I am now over my cold feet and am ready to get engaged. I just wondered why is it that sex has changed between us since I put that thought in his head?? He is now way ...
A. 11 January 2007: You have comitted to him and the chances are this has given him tonnes more confidence. if I where you I would be enjoying every minute!!... (read in full...)
Do all women shave their pubic regions?
Q. Ladys. do all women shave the pubic hair regions? i prefer to see a small amount of hair. is this normal for me?...
A. 11 January 2007: No not all of it. I like to look like a woman not a ten year old. Plus it is a bugger when it grows back, like a hedgehog in your knickers!!... (read in full...)
I developed stretch marks from gaining weight and now I'm losing weight they are still there!
Q. Dear aunt Ive become really sad recently because of my body. When growing i developed a few stretch mark at the top of my legs, i was never down hearted about this because they wernt that visable. However, Earlier this year after a rough ...
A. 11 January 2007: Pete IS right about the Bio oil, it has been PROVEN to work in reducing the appearance of scars and stretch marks. As for them disappearing so you cannot see them that actually depends on how deep the tearing is that cretaed the strech marks in the ... (read in full...)
I know it makes you blind, but is this another side effect?
Q. Is it true that when you masturbate it kills thousnads of brain cells?...
A. 11 January 2007: Even moderation in chocolate??...can't agree with that Pete...... (read in full...)
My long-distance fiance is in Amsterdam and hung up when he heard my voice! What's going on?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half now and we met in England. But my visa ran out so i had to come back home, he said he would come with me once he got his visa. Just before i left he proposed to me. It's been a month and a half since ...
A. 11 January 2007: Very glad to hear that!!... (read in full...)
Married man dilemma! I am hooked! What should I do now?
Q. Hi, I am in a dilemma - divorced 5 years ago, several opportunities for relationships along the way and always declined. A co-worker that I have known and talked to daily for the past 3 years - and purely work conversations - for never an instance...
A. 10 January 2007: Sadly even if you two got together legitimately, you would always be watching for when he would do the same thing to you.
Just a thought.... (read in full...)
My long-distance fiance is in Amsterdam and hung up when he heard my voice! What's going on?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half now and we met in England. But my visa ran out so i had to come back home, he said he would come with me once he got his visa. Just before i left he proposed to me. It's been a month and a half since ...
A. 10 January 2007: Depending on which telephone service provider he is with he may not be able to recieve calls as in some countries it costs money not only to make the call but also to recieve it (major rip off I know!).
But I would have thought he would have bee... (read in full...)
Do I have Seasonal Affective Disorder? Does anyone know more about this?
Q. I don't know why but recently I have felt a little low, and a bit down. I have been quite tired a lot too and felt worn out. I have been working quite a bit, and my job is very physical with lifting heavy goods. I go too the gym three times a week ...
A. 9 January 2007: Pete is spot on. I am a sufferer of SAD also, but have been told by various so called 'professionals' that it doesn't exsist. I have found (when I can afford it, which was pre-being a student again) that an annual jaunt to the Carribean works very ... (read in full...)
Can you still have a healthy sex life at 40?
Q. hey guys, I am a young woman in my 20's and i have a question. How is it like to be in a relationship with a 40 year old man? Can you have a healthy sex life with them or is it not that frequent. ...
A. 9 January 2007: Sorry -- I meant usually the older you are the more time you have had to perfect your technique!! Practice makes perfect and all that!... (read in full...)
Can you still have a healthy sex life at 40?
Q. hey guys, I am a young woman in my 20's and i have a question. How is it like to be in a relationship with a 40 year old man? Can you have a healthy sex life with them or is it not that frequent. ...
A. 9 January 2007: As with anything chronological age can be blamed for a lot. The age of forty is no precluder to good sex, in fact age and experience can make it a whole lot better. Very often younger lovers (of both sexes)can be shy and embarrassed about the ... (read in full...)
I keep getting waves of sickness and dizziness, could this mean i am pregnant?
Q. I had sex with my boyfriend and the condom split...its way too late for emergency contraception now and we both tried our hardest top get some but we were refused and the doctors had no free appointments. We always use condoms but this time it ...
A. 9 January 2007: Yes you could be pregnant simply because sperm entered your vagina. You will not know if you are until you take a pregnancy test though. So go and do it asap.
x... (read in full...)
Am I bulimic like my friend was?
Q. hey.. so i hve a problem a couple of months my friend started being bulimic and she lost about a stone and a half but she started couffing up blood now shes stopped but i think im starting to be - when i eat food it always makes me feel sick and...
A. 6 January 2007: This is something that need professional help. You are feeling sick --is this a feeling you are then acting upon to make yourself sick or jsut an excuse for your behaviour when you act upon it.
Go see your GP.... (read in full...)
I know it makes you blind, but is this another side effect?
Q. Is it true that when you masturbate it kills thousnads of brain cells?...
A. 6 January 2007: LOL ponungalungb x
PS Cool name...... (read in full...)
We only have sex once a week he stares at porn the rest of the time!
Q. My significant other watches a lot of porn and we have sex about once a week. I want to be with him more. I feel like hes cheating on me because he is fantisizing about other woman. I feel very low and disgusting although I have very men hit on me ...
A. 6 January 2007: Here we go agian Miss brave female anon....haraas somebody who has a different viewpoint to your own instead of being articulate and maybe expressing why you think your perspective is correct and passthechocolates is not! Show me the real ... (read in full...)
How do I feel good about myself when I don't compete with the icons on screen and in magazines?
Q. I can compete with these women?how? Im22,i dont get the opportunity to wear sexy clothes like all these girls do on posters and magazines, and itslike,myboyfriend never sees me in the sexy way he see's them. I just dont know how im supposed to f...
A. 5 January 2007: AND STOP BEING ANONYMOUS!! HAVE THE GUTS TO MAKE YOURSELF KNOWN!! Or do you not have the courage to do it?... (read in full...)
How do I feel good about myself when I don't compete with the icons on screen and in magazines?
Q. I can compete with these women?how? Im22,i dont get the opportunity to wear sexy clothes like all these girls do on posters and magazines, and itslike,myboyfriend never sees me in the sexy way he see's them. I just dont know how im supposed to f...
A. 5 January 2007: AND STOP BEING ANONYMOUS!! HAVE THE GUTS TO MAKE YOURSELF KNOWN!! Or do you not have the courage to do it?... (read in full...)
How do I feel good about myself when I don't compete with the icons on screen and in magazines?
Q. I can compete with these women?how? Im22,i dont get the opportunity to wear sexy clothes like all these girls do on posters and magazines, and itslike,myboyfriend never sees me in the sexy way he see's them. I just dont know how im supposed to f...
A. 5 January 2007: God, whoever it is baiting Martini pack it in. He is actually right on a heck of a lotta things.
This issue is about the individuals insecurity....... (read in full...)
Girlfriend dlept with guy over 2 years ago! I can't get him out of my mind!
Q. hi there. please help me get my head around this, as its making me completely miserable and paranoid! i have been with my girlfriend for over 2 years now. we are really close and most of the time it is perfect. However before i met her she slep...
A. 5 January 2007: Can I butt in. Now having read the post can I just point out that the question asker only mentions that they feel insecure because of the other fellas skin colour. Does this not mean that he wishes he was like this becasue she liked it? Where ... (read in full...)
Why do many females, that have been raped--become sexually active after this crime agianst them?
Q. Look Im at with young females so they ask me this question " Why does female became very sexaulity active after they been rape. So can someone please answer that question for me....
A. 30 December 2006: Pete is actually spot on. I have studied rape as both a psychologist AND as a survivor. Initially (with the benefit of hindsite) I viewed sex as a 'means to an end' and not a 'valuable' in a relationship as I had previously, although I never ... (read in full...)
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