New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244961 questions, 1084299 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

*rueLoveWaits2016

United States  (Female   XML/RSS

Like what she writes?
... Add *rueLoveWaits2016 to your favourite agony aunts

Want to get in touch?
... Send *rueLoveWaits2016 a private message

*rueLoveWaits2016's Ratings
Excellent73%
Average13%
Poor13%
< Prev123Next > [3 pages, 97 answers]

I think a year is a long time to wait for him ...

Q.   So, ive been seeing this guy for a few months now he's a couple years older than me (being 25), when we first started speaking in july and from that point i thought it was going to be more of a friendly kind of relationship as he didn't seem my type ...

A.   6 October 2017: He does not want a relationship w/you, just sex. If he wanted a relationship, you would be in one together. Never trust a man's excuses for not committing to you because they are all BS.... (read in full...)

I deserve better than to be ghosted by someone that I thought cared about me

Q.   We were close friends (according to him) but our feelings for each other complicated things. He shied away from having a relationship. He told me he was scared to be a rebound, because his last relationship was a rebound and ended miserably. I was ...

A.   30 September 2017: I agree w/honeypie, don't hold in the bitterness, just learn from this. When someone lets you in like that and goes hot/cold, that can be incredibly painful. You def deserve better and if you continue to chase him, you will not catch him. When ... (read in full...)

What is going on? Are these just excuses?

Q.   After still feeling neglected, I told my bf exactly why I was feeling down. In the last couple of weeks I have noticed that I was initiating the messages, which is ok, but I feel like I'm pestering esp being the only one initiating Messaging was ...

A.   26 September 2017: Last week I actually pushed myself to get out there and went out a couple nights out of the week. He was very concerned about me going out w/out him, but I wasn't going there to flirt w/other guys, though I went the last I went out and felt kinda ... (read in full...)

What is going on? Are these just excuses?

Q.   After still feeling neglected, I told my bf exactly why I was feeling down. In the last couple of weeks I have noticed that I was initiating the messages, which is ok, but I feel like I'm pestering esp being the only one initiating Messaging was ...

A.   26 September 2017: I still take the bus, idk why he even brought that up. I understand people cannot text all day, had a guy like that and he wanted me to text all the time, like I couldn't go an hour w/out texting him. In the past I didn't feel this neglected. I... (read in full...)

Is this a genuine concern or is he blowing me off?

Q.   My bf and I have been together for a couple months. He treats me really well and is different from the other guys that I dated. One thing though that has really started to worry me, is him trying to drop me off at home early in the day. He works ...

A.   22 September 2017: He does take me out and our time together is amazing. Lately I've been feeling quite a bit of neglect.... (read in full...)

He's rejected me but is open to having sex. I'm upset but tempted to, since I'll be bored and alone in his city.

Q.   I apologize in advance...this is a long one! I met a guy on Tinder back in March of this year. I was going to be in San Francisco for a few days and wanted to meet people while there so I changed my location to SF and started talking to him. ...

A.   22 September 2017: Don't settle for being his f buddy, you are worth a lot more then that. I can understand the falling in love w/tinder guys, been there myself. Do not give up what you want (being in a relationship) to get bread crumbs from guys. Moving to a new ... (read in full...)

I thought things were progressing well so why does she seemed to have slowed down?

Q.   A few days ago I was on cloud nine. I had finally gone out with a great girl after a couple weeks of chatting on Facebook since we were both moving back to our hometown. We clicked really well while we were chatting, she was very responsive and f...

A.   21 September 2017: Don't ask her out anymore. From the looks of it, she lost interest. I learned the these patterns of disinterest after extensive online dating. I would so excited about a date or 2 going well and all a sudden the guy would pull back, either trying ... (read in full...)

Is this something I can fix by correcting a few actions in our relationship? Do I give her space and trust that she will end up with me? What do I do?

Q.   My gf of 1.5 years recently told me that she likes a guy from work as as more than friends but is unsure about what to do. She said she loves me and she doesn't love him because it is too early to tell. She said she recognizes that it is unfair to ...

A.   21 September 2017: Give her space, permanent space. If she loved you, she wouldn't have any other guys that she likes. Leave and find someone who only wants you!... (read in full...)

My long distance boyfriend is a bad communicator.

Q.   I have been dating a guy for about 7 months. We started out as friends and had known each other for about 4 years, and then began dating. We started out dating close proximity, but then due to work and school, were forced to become long distance. We ...

A.   15 September 2017: Aunt Honesty is correct, a person does what they want to do. Been there in a long distance and I found out the guy wasn't super interested in me. From the sound of it, he doesn't seem all that interested, my long distance ex did the same thing. ... (read in full...)

Am I moving on too fast? And how and when do I tell the new guy about my past and the fact that my ex still lives in the same house as me?

Q.   I have recently split with my partner of 8 years , we have fallen out of love and we both thought it was the best decision to cut it off. He still lives in the same house as me though in seperate rooms and he still helps with shopping/lifts etc - ...

A.   15 September 2017: Bad idea to date when your ex is still is still living w/your ex. My 1st love lived w/his and that caused nothing but issues. Please consider taking care of your business before bringing in another person.... (read in full...)

Are we incompatible if he has these concerns early on?

Q.   Dear Cupid, my boyfriend is hurt that I don't spend more time with him and that I'm not giving him enough attention. I have crippling depression and often I am so anxious and so deflated even basic functions are difficult. I still see him at least ...

A.   15 September 2017: From dating someone similar, all I can tell you is the situation and his behavior will get worse. I dated a guy who had issues and nothing was ever enough for him. We talked on the phone everyday for hours, messaged all day and saw each other ... (read in full...)

Is it too soon to mention I'd like more contact?

Q.   Hello and thanks in advance for reading. I'm having trouble dating and trusting men after a very difficult year that I'm slowly getting through and coming to terms with. This year I've had to deal with sudden job changes, dates going wrong a...

A.   15 September 2017: I sympathize w/you 100%, but I advise not saying anything and seeing what he does. I have been in that position quite a few times and I wish I had been patient in watching the guy's actions vs their words. I have learned that you don't need to ... (read in full...)

Now that he's abroad he doesn't contact me at all!

Q.   Hi, I'm in a strange "relationship" with my colleague and I don't know what to do..One year ago I've got this new job..when i met with my coworker, it was instant chemistry, he always look at me, trying to contact me..but i heard he's a player s...

A.   8 September 2017: He is a player and will say anything to get what he wants. More then likely he found some other woman to charm and bed. I know charming these men can be and when the veil is lifted, you are left wondering what the heck happened. Best thing, ... (read in full...)

Getting over my GF not being a virgin.

Q.   Hello people. I'm a 21 year old guy, I've graduated college, have a cool job, and have been working in a great firm the past 2 years. I was raised in a small town, in a very catholic and conservative family. Nonetheless I'm an agnostic and I n...

A.   7 September 2017: Think of it this way, when she lost her virginity, she didn't know you. Not that she didn't wait, just that she was in love w/someone else. Everyone is going to have a history and she is now w/you. It wasn't meant for you to meet at that time. I ... (read in full...)

Am I just hoping for the best and not wanting to accept reality?

Q.   Just in a new relationship and he's moved back home to the south of our country (about 200 miles from me). We decided to just see how things go and he definitely asked me to be his. However, he hardly calls. If he does, It has to be before ...

A.   7 September 2017: To also answer your question; yes you are hoping for the best and I can understand why. I have learned when dating, you need to accept reality. The reality here is he doesn't communicate or make any effort w/you. You deserve way better.... (read in full...)

Am I just hoping for the best and not wanting to accept reality?

Q.   Just in a new relationship and he's moved back home to the south of our country (about 200 miles from me). We decided to just see how things go and he definitely asked me to be his. However, he hardly calls. If he does, It has to be before ...

A.   7 September 2017: You are not even close to being on the list of his priorities. You def do not want to be w/a guy like that, not trying to be negative, but I was in a similar situation and I was miserable. I made every excuse in the book for this guy not tex... (read in full...)

I'm starting to overanalyze again, I'm afraid of self sabatoge in my relationship?

Q.   Due to me making the wrong choices w/the types of guys I date, I always have doubt of his interest in the back of my mind. My bf came from vacation and I have asked to see him. Before anyone tears me into pieces about him being tired, overwhelmed ...

A.   6 September 2017: I finished work in the early afternoon and he didn't have work that day. The weird thing is he didn't mention anything about getting together until I mentioned wanting to see him late in the evening.... (read in full...)

My LDR says we are just prolonging the inevitable end.

Q.   I have been in an LDR for 8 years, and in that 8 years, we have only been physically together for a total time of 3 months on 4 occasions. The rest of the time has been spent talking almost daily on video skype and various chat apps. In recent...

A.   28 August 2017: Once anyone starts telling you what will be good for you (dating others), that is the beginning of the end. He doesn't want to continue this relationship. No amounts of visits or calls will make him want to continue. I have never been in such a ... (read in full...)

What is your interpretation when a guy says that you are what he needs in a relationship, but he is scared that he is not what you need?

Q.   What is your interpretation when a guy says that you are what he needs in a relationship, but he is scared that he is not what you need? His interpretation of need is that the girl is stable, respectable and knows what she wants in life and how to ...

A.   26 August 2017: I interpret this as him not having interest in the person he is feeding these lines to and wants to reject you w/out looking like the bad guy. I have gotten these lines before and the guys just didn't have the balls to tell me they weren't ... (read in full...)

I'm ready to leave, but how do I take my dignity with me?

Q.   Ive been seeing a 34 year old guy for two full months now. He treats me well, takes me out to nice places well until i saw him texting other girls on social me. I caught him once flirting with girls the one time we went shopping together. I told him ...

A.   24 August 2017: If you want to preserve your dignity, walk away and don't look back. ... (read in full...)

Why would he say he isn't right for me, yet I'm right for him but he still doesn't want a relationship?

Q.   Please be patient as I outline my story. We were good friends and disclosed our feelings for each other a few months after re-establishing contact. He's been supportive of me from the beginning, and we have always playfully flirted. There was ...

A.   20 August 2017: He is saying that because he does not want a relationship w/you and is letting you down easy. I have experienced guys telling me the same thing and learned that when excuses come out, he doesn't want to be w/you.... (read in full...)

Is it petty that I am annoyed that the man I am dating is cheap?

Q.   I am dating a guy who is about a decade older than me. On our first date we went to a restaurant (one he'd chosen and he asked me out). When the bill came he wanted to split it. He has a very well paying job. I am setting up my own business and earn ...

A.   18 August 2017: I'm on the fence on this one. When going out w/a guy, I don't look for someone who will pay for everything, but certainly nice to get treated. When I 1st started dating my bf, he paid for everything, now we split (I pay for one date, he pays for ... (read in full...)

My ex bf contacted me, I told my bf about it, mistake or no?

Q.   I dated this guy briefly, but broke up w/him due to him being a control freak and somewhat mentally unstable. His number was blocked, but the other day I deleted all my blocked numbers (I didn't even know it was his number). He ended up messaging ...

A.   16 August 2017: lol no he isn't a jealous control freak. I told him about this because I am afraid that the other guy could cause problems for us.... (read in full...)

How do I make my wrong turn right?

Q.   Hello i have another question connected to the one i asked earlier , about Reason(s) from Decent man. Shall i message her and say I Really like you a lot . And i am not after ( you know what ) As i am a Decent man ( which is what she ...

A.   15 August 2017: You do sound very clingy and will come across as creepy. If I don't want a second date w/a guy, I don't want a second date. Reminds me of the guy I rejected after the 1st date, he was not happy that I made that decision and kept messaging me how I ... (read in full...)

His ex girlfriends stuff is still a his place!

Q.   I have been dating my bf for almost a couple months. He was w/his ex for a long time and still has her stuff tho its been awhile since they broke up. Her stuff is still there and I want it gone, I don't want her to have any hold on him. He has ...

A.   14 August 2017: We are exclusive been for almost a few months. Its not gifts she gave him, its her stuff that she wants backs (random house stuff), I never asked him if he kept gifts from her, I don't care. I really care about him and I can feel like this is ... (read in full...)

His ex girlfriends stuff is still a his place!

Q.   I have been dating my bf for almost a couple months. He was w/his ex for a long time and still has her stuff tho its been awhile since they broke up. Her stuff is still there and I want it gone, I don't want her to have any hold on him. He has ...

A.   13 August 2017: W/my 1st ex I did make the mistake of letting the ex stuff slide (I knew early on). W/my current bf, he mentioned he had her stuff, but never went into details until much later. I don't feel like a rebound, he never just uses me for sex nor did he ... (read in full...)

His ex girlfriends stuff is still a his place!

Q.   I have been dating my bf for almost a couple months. He was w/his ex for a long time and still has her stuff tho its been awhile since they broke up. Her stuff is still there and I want it gone, I don't want her to have any hold on him. He has ...

A.   12 August 2017: I do regret giving an ultimatum, but I've had really bad experiences w/several guys who still had exes in their lives. The stuff is just house stuff. It worries me because she has contacted him recently and he told me that she is pretty spiteful ... (read in full...)

My ex bf contacted me, I told my bf about it, mistake or no?

Q.   I dated this guy briefly, but broke up w/him due to him being a control freak and somewhat mentally unstable. His number was blocked, but the other day I deleted all my blocked numbers (I didn't even know it was his number). He ended up messaging ...

A.   8 August 2017: I am def not going to answer again. I was honest and open w/my bf because idk if the other guy will pull anything stupid and if he does attempt anything my bf would wonder why I never told him that he contacted me.... (read in full...)

We met twice and now she says she wants space. Doesn't she like me?

Q.   I met a girl online and we've met in person on two occasions. We seemed to just click from the beginning and she even said she didn't understand why I was still single. We've spoken on the telephone at length between meetings, however following our ...

A.   1 August 2017: No she is not interested. Stop texting and calling her.... (read in full...)

If he keeps sending selfies does he like me as more than a friend?

Q.   I have a guy friend who regularly sends me selfies of himself (nothing sexual or shirtless) just pictures from his shoulders up usually or a close up of his face. I don't ask for them. Last week he sent me a selfie of his new hairstyle, with the ...

A.   1 August 2017: Could be the guy is obsessed w/himself. I'm not trying to generalize, but men who have sent a ton of selfies (w/out me asking), were very into themselves. ... (read in full...)

Did I accidentally lead my controlling ex boyfriend on?

Q.   Currently I have an amazing bf who I've been dating for a short while. Before I started dating him, I dated another guy for a short while who turned out to be a total control freak. When I 1st met him, the feeling of being wanted felt very good. ...

A.   29 July 2017: I def found out he wasn't a good guy, I did learn, quite fast actually.... (read in full...)

Did I accidentally lead my controlling ex boyfriend on?

Q.   Currently I have an amazing bf who I've been dating for a short while. Before I started dating him, I dated another guy for a short while who turned out to be a total control freak. When I 1st met him, the feeling of being wanted felt very good. ...

A.   28 July 2017: He is out of my life, just a feel a little guilty getting involved w/him so much. When I 1st met him, I thought he was just a caring guy, where actually he did the nice things to control me.... (read in full...)

He's fun but I'm feeling used

Q.   Hi everyone. This divorced - with - 2 - kids guy I met described himself as financially comfortable but I am always paying and he says he 'would pay if he could/ will pay next time/when a big deal comes through? When I asked whether he would...

A.   27 July 2017: What everyone is saying is true, if you feel like you are being used, you most likely are. That's extremely ridiculous that you pay every time. Stop seeing him or he will continue to use you.... (read in full...)

How do I handle my critical dad? He's given me poor self-esteem!

Q.   I've been struggling w/this for years w/my dad. My dad does love me, I do know that. When it comes down to me, he has always been negative w/about 95% of everything. For the last 10 years he has been convinced that I'm overweight and will be ...

A.   21 July 2017: Thank you, I do not want to cut contact and I'm trying my very best to desensitize myself from this situation. I have vowed never to speak to my children like that (If I have any). I just wish he knew how damaging it has been for me and if I ever ... (read in full...)

Now it's hard to trust

Q.   A little while ago I left a guy who tried to control me. After bad dating experiences I had walls up, so I was able to pick up on things that didn't feel right. The attention was flattering at 1st, but then got emotionally draining, he didn't tr...

A.   14 July 2017: Sometimes he reads my messages, but doesn't respond. Is that a bad thing? We do go out and we do talk on the phone. Just very wary of that behavior.... (read in full...)

Was he lying about his reasons for blocking me?

Q.   I was dating a guy and he was leaving on duty for a couple weeks. He lied to me about deleting social media, he actually ended up blocking me. When I caught him in his lie, he said anxiety and paranoia made him delete me, he thought I would stalk ...

A.   27 March 2017: He is talking to me, not via that social media place, but through email and another app.... (read in full...)

I think I got played and feel like a fool

Q.   I talked about this guy before, he actually manipulated me and got me as far as fooling around and sending pics (naughty pics). As soon as I cut that off, he lied to me big time. I feel like a fool?...

A.   27 March 2017: I don't think its a threat thing, we exchanged them over snapchat, he sent me pics as well.... (read in full...)

I asked him to slow down ... did I screw up?

Q.   I met a guy on an online app. We are both super interested in each other just that I needed him to slow down as he was coming on way too strong. He started talking relationship stuff even before we met, which would be fine, but I don't trust a guy ...

A.   24 March 2017: Does that mean that he won't want a relationship w/me anymore? I tried my best not to get excited for that very reason, but I did.... (read in full...)

I asked him to slow down ... did I screw up?

Q.   I met a guy on an online app. We are both super interested in each other just that I needed him to slow down as he was coming on way too strong. He started talking relationship stuff even before we met, which would be fine, but I don't trust a guy ...

A.   24 March 2017: Not anymore though, he got too ahead of himself. I tried to be cautious as well, but I got my hopes up as well. Now its kind of up in the air.... (read in full...)

I asked him to slow down ... did I screw up?

Q.   I met a guy on an online app. We are both super interested in each other just that I needed him to slow down as he was coming on way too strong. He started talking relationship stuff even before we met, which would be fine, but I don't trust a guy ...

A.   23 March 2017: We did meet up and I haven't disabled any of my accounts. Funny thing is he wanted to be the guy that had me take down my profile. I wish I had told him how I felt after meeting him. Right now I'm not interested in dating anyone but him.... (read in full...)

I asked him to slow down ... did I screw up?

Q.   I met a guy on an online app. We are both super interested in each other just that I needed him to slow down as he was coming on way too strong. He started talking relationship stuff even before we met, which would be fine, but I don't trust a guy ...

A.   23 March 2017: I really did put the brakes on because I had 2 guys, younger age just like this guy, start something serious then pull out completely. Thing is tho, he is only going to be gone for 3 weeks and then he is back for quite awhile. I just don't want ... (read in full...)

*rueLoveWaits2016's friends

These are mutual friends, so *rueLoveWaits2016 has added them and they have added *rueLoveWaits2016!

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0937632999994094!